Godless Perverts Social Club — Game Night! Tuesday November 3

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This month, we’re trying something different: Godless Perverts is having a game night! As regular attendees of the Godless Perverts Social Club may have noticed, Wicked Grounds (San Francisco’s legendary kink cafe) has a huge stash of games including chess and checkers, Cards Against Humanity, Scrabble, Fluxx, Gloom, Slash, and much, much more. Feel free to bring your own games if you’re not sure that Wicked Grounds has a copy of your favorite.

(Note: If you decide to play Cards Against Humanity, please be cautious; it can be a really hard game between people who don’t know each other and aren’t familiar with each others’ limits and triggers.)

We meet at Wicked Grounds, 289 8th Street in San Francisco (at Folsom, near Civic Center BART), 7-9pm. It’s free, although we ask that you buy food and/or drink at the cafe if you can. All orientations, genders, and kinks (or lack thereof) are welcome. Community is one of the reasons we started Godless Perverts. There are few enough places to land when you decide that you’re an atheist; far fewer if you’re also LGBT, queer, kinky, poly, trans, or are just interested in sexuality. And the sex-positive/ alt-sex/ whatever- you- want- to- call- it community isn’t always the most welcoming place for non-believers. So please join us! We meet in San Francisco at Wicked Grounds on the first Tuesday of every month: we also meet on the third Thursday of every month in Oakland, at Telegraph Beer Garden.

Godless Perverts presents and promotes a positive view of sexuality without religion, by and for sex-positive atheists, agnostics, humanists, and other non-believers, through performance events, panel discussions, social gatherings, media productions, and other appropriate outlets. Our events and media productions present depictions, explorations, and celebrations of godless sexualities — including positive, traumatic, and complex experiences — focusing on the intersections of sexuality with atheism, materialism, skepticism, and science, as well as critical, questioning, mocking, or blasphemous views of sex and religion.

Godless Perverts is committed to feminism, diversity, inclusivity, and social justice. We seek to create safe and welcoming environments for all non-believers and believing allies who are respectful of the mission, and are committed to taking positive action to achieve this. Hope to see you there!

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

Godless Perverts Social Club — Game Night! Tuesday November 3
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The Brown Crayon: A Lesson In Racism, Literally Taught By a Teacher at School

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So I was in first grade. How old is that? Six? Seven? Our classroom activity for the hour was coloring in coloring books: I have no idea what the purpose was, if any sort of teaching was intended or if we were just being kept busy. But we’d been given coloring books with pictures of children doing wholesome activities of everyday life, brushing their teeth and riding bikes and whatnot. And we’d been given standard sets of first-grade crayons, fat crayons in eight colors. Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, brown, and black.

So I looked at these crayons, thought about which color to use for the faces and bodies, and settled on brown. Of the eight, that was the color that most looked to me like an actual human skin color. I briefly considered yellow — it was closest to my own skin color, and I’d also heard “yellow” used to describe people of Asian descent, usually when People Of All Races in late-Sixties folk songs were being referred to as white, black, red, yellow, and brown. But I looked at the yellow crayon, with its bright canary color — and nobody I knew, of Asian descent or any other, had skin anything like that. So brown it was.

I didn’t really think about it that carefully. My thought process as I’m describing it here makes it seem a lot more thought-out than it was. It was a quick, almost reflexive decision — more like, “Hm. People. Eight colors. Yellow? (Quick scan of abovementioned reasons.) No. Brown? Sure.” It was a quick decision — and to me, it was an obvious one. To be honest, if we’d had a bigger crayon selection with the color troublingly labelled “flesh,” I probably would have picked that, or another color that looked like me. But we didn’t. We had the eight colors — and of those, brown was the one that looked like people. The school I went to was pretty racially mixed, the neighborhood I lived in and had lived my whole life in was pretty racially mixed, and I really didn’t give it much thought. I wasn’t working to advance the cause of black visibility or anything; I wasn’t an early Social Justice Warrior. I was just a literal-minded six or seven year old, in 1967 or 1968, coloring pictures of people to look like my friends and neighbors.

So we handed in our coloring books, or the teacher collected them, I don’t remember. A little while later, the teacher came over to me, with this concerned look on her face. And she asked, “Greta — why did you make all the people in your coloring book black?”

And when I say concerned, I mean CONCERNED. This was not a casual question. This wasn’t the teacher talking to lots of different students about their coloring books; this wasn’t asked in the casual context of a general discussion of the coloring books, like, “So let’s talk about how you decided how to color your books. Why did you make the flowers purple? Why did you make the house yellow? Why did you make the people brown?” No. This was not that. The teacher very deliberately came over to me, personally — only to me, as far as I could tell — and asked why I’d made all the people in my coloring book black. And she was worried. Kids can tell. I could tell. She wasn’t angry or scolding or anything like that. She was just seriously worried. This was a red flag to her, a sign that Something Was Wrong.

I want to emphasize again: This was a racially-mixed school, in a racially-mixed neighborhood. And it was a fairly liberal school and neighborhood. So this was weird to me. Looking at it now, I’m sure I’d gotten thousands of unconscious racist messages from my family — but consciously, they were good 60’s and 70’s liberals, politically active about lots of things including racism, and with lots of friends of lots of different races. I’m sure I got thousands of unconscious racist messages from my family. But this was the first time I can remember seeing white anxiety about black people so explicitly spelled out.

And it freaked me the fuck out.

I answered my teacher honestly. I explained about the eight colors, and how brown was the one that looked most like people. She accepted the answer — or at least, she dropped the issue. But I could tell she wasn’t satisfied. I could tell she was still concerned.

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Understand, I was a very good kid — “good” in this case meaning “smart, good at school, trusting of teachers and parents and other authority figures, and anxious about pleasing them.” Very, very anxious about pleasing them. So this worried me. Had I done something wrong? Was there something wrong with me? At the same time, I knew something was wrong — not with me, but with her, with this conversation. So this stuck with me. I chewed it over, and chewed it over, and chewed it over. If I’d been Riley in “Inside Out,” this would have been a memory bubble dropping straight into the Core Memory file, a memory swirling with a mix of colors: purple for fear, green for disgust, red for anger, and blue for sadness. But I didn’t have the language to explain it at the time.

I have that language now. Let me spell it out.

I was being taught that there was something weird and scary about not making “white” the default race.

This was not a subtle, unconscious thing; this was not a glance, a gesture, a decision to cross the street or clutch the purse tighter. I was being overtly taught — by a teacher, in my school, during class time, in the context of a class assignment — that there was something weird and scary about not making “white” the default.

I was being taught, by a teacher, in school, that there was something weird and scary about seeing pictures of people brushing their teeth, riding bikes, engaging in wholesome activities of everyday life, and not automatically seeing them as white, and doing whatever I could do with my limited eight-color crayon box to make them white. I was being taught, by a teacher, in school, that there was something weird and scary about seeing pictures of people, engaging in wholesome activities of everyday life, and seeing them as black.

I was being taught, by a teacher, in school, that there was something weird and scary about seeing my black and brown classmates, teachers, neighbors, friends, as people.

I’m sure other people have much uglier stories of being taught much nastier forms of racism in school, much more blatantly, by much more bigoted teachers. (Exhibit A: the black teenager who was recently assaulted and arrested by a cop in her classroom for breaking school rules.) Actually, that’s a big part of the point.

Given everything I know about my grade school, I doubt highly that my teacher thought of herself as racist. To this day, I don’t know what she was worried about — or rather, what she told herself she was worried about. I don’t know if there’s some troubling thing teachers are taught to look for if kids draw pictures of kids who don’t look like them, or if in her mind it was just garden-variety conformity policing, This Is Weird And Different So I’d Better Check It Out. I doubt highly that she thought of herself as racist. But I know what I heard in her voice, what I saw in her face. What I heard in her voice, what I saw in her face, was, “This white child filled her coloring book with pictures of black people. When this white child thinks of people, she thinks of black people. Crap. Something must be wrong.”

I know this lesson hasn’t gone away. I know that the thousands of lessons like it haven’t gone away; I know that all the work I’ve put into unlearning these lessons are only a partial success, that this will be an ongoing adult education project for the rest of my life. I know that it took years of education, years of seeing it pointed out again and again, to notice when movies and TV shows have all-white casts, to notice when the only black characters are servants, criminals, athletes, and entertainers. I know that it took years of education to understand that black people being harassed and beaten and killed by police are not isolated incidents; that for black people in the U.S., brutally racist police forces are an ordinary experience of everyday life. I know that I still have the reflex, learned at a very young age, to clutch my purse when I pass a youngish black person on the street; I know that I have to consciously make myself not do this. When I think about that teacher’s lesson, and the thousands of lessons like it, I still have the swirly ball of emotion — but with less fear than I had at six or seven, and with more disgust, more sadness, more anger.

brown crayon
I’m also grateful for the other lessons. I’m grateful that I had the degree of consciousness that I did have, even at age six or seven, to notice in this conversation that something was wrong. I’m grateful to everyone in my young life, to everyone in my school and my neighborhood and my family, even to my fucked-up parents, who all taught me, by word and deed, not even that black lives matter, but that black people exist, and are people. I’m grateful to everyone in my young life who taught me to look at a box of eight crayons, and see that the brown crayon looked like people.

But I still have the swirly ball of emotion, the fear and disgust, the anger and sadness, at the fact that still, to this day, this is a lesson that needs to be taught.

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

The Brown Crayon: A Lesson In Racism, Literally Taught By a Teacher at School

More Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Dawkins or Harris: Bakari Chavanu

In June, I wrote a piece for AlterNet, titled 8 Awesome Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Richard Dawkins or Sam Harris. The gist: When a media outlet decides that atheism is important, they all too often turn to Richard Dawkins or Sam Harris. Then, when Dawkins or Harris puts their foot in their mouth about race or gender — again — the reporter cries out, “Atheism needs better leadership! Why doesn’t atheism have better leaders?” Atheism does have better leaders — so I profiled eight of them, to bring just a small fragment of the range and variety of atheist leadership to more people’s attention.

At the end of that piece, I wrote, “And these eight are the tip of the iceberg… I could write a new profile of a different atheist leader every week, and still be at it ten years from now.”

So I decided: Why not do that?

I don’t know if I’ll do it for ten years. But for at least a while, once a week I’ll be profiling and interviewing a different leader in organized atheism.

This week’s profile: Bakari Chavanu.

GC: Tell me briefly what your organization does and what you do for them. (If you’re in a leadership position with more than one atheist organization, feel free to tell me about more than one.)

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BC: The purpose of the Black Humanists and Non-Believers of Sacramento is to specifically outreach to people of African descent who are either atheists or are thinking in that direction. Since we formed the group back in October of 2015 2014, we have mainly hosted tables at predominantly African American events in Sacramento, such as the Martin Luther King Jr. Expo, the Black Book Faire, and Juneteenth, as well as the annual Freethought Day.

We think it’s important to engage people at these events about atheism, theism, and humanism. Using Meetup.com, we also plan and hold social activities, including a monthly breakfast and book club. By having a presence on Meetup, several African Americans have joined our group, specifically because it is a Black atheist and humanist group which they felt more comfortable joining. [Note from GC: The group also has a Facebook page.]

Mashariki [co-organizer of Black Humanists and Non-Believers of Sacramento] and I are also board members of the Reason Center, which is a non-profit community center of atheist affiliated groups. Though we’re a Black atheist group, we also try to network with other atheist groups in the area and beyond.

Tell me about a specific project or projects your organization is working on.

In the coming months we plan to organize workshops around related issues, and I personally would like to see us hold formal debates with representatives of the Black theist community. There simply has not been enough public debates about religion in Black communities, though there certainly lots of discussions about religious and theistic issues.

Where would you like to see organized atheism go in the next 10 to 20 years?

I would like see a lot more outreach to young people because I think it’s critical that they hear both sides of the theist-atheist debate. I also would like to connect with atheists who support social and economic justice, because for me atheism is about what you don’t believe in, but humanism is what you do believe in. I would like to see humanism as a political ideology for shaping political, social, and economic policies.

What do you think are the main challenges facing organized atheism now?

Bakari Chavanu co-hosting table at Martin Luther King Jr Expo in Sacramento
The challenge I think is being able to reach out and engage people about the problems and even dangers of religious beliefs. Unfortunately, too many public and political institutions and social relationships in the US and around the world are still largely shaped by religious beliefs, practices, and discrimination. Though more and more young people are leaving the church, there are still large numbers of people who don’t get the opportunity to engage critically about what they are told to believe. Our role as atheist activists is to humbly reach out to those folks.

Do you consider yourself a “new atheist”? Why or why not?

No I don’t think I’m a “new atheist,” at least not in terms of how the media as seemed to frame term. Typically “new atheist” refers to the so-called four horsemen: Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, Christopher Hitchens, and Daniel Bennet. Of course I am not one of them, though I read and respect their work and their contributions to helping build and spread the atheist movement.

I consider myself a humanist, and an advocate of modern socialism, because I think these ideologies could make the world better, by transforming humanity out of the destructive aspirations of economic competition, greed, and exploitation of resources — motivated by obscene wealth accumulation. My view of humanism is that it must encompass a struggle against racism and White supremacy, sexism, and the environmental destruction of the planet. The term “new atheist” doesn’t tie together atheism with issues of social and economic justice, so I can’t say the term applies to me.

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

More Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Dawkins or Harris: Bakari Chavanu

The Part About Black Lives Mattering Where White People Shut Up and Listen

This piece was originally published in The Humanist.

black lives matter
Listen up, fellow white people.

If we care about racism — and if we’re humanists, we bloody well better — there’s something we need to do. It’s enormously important. If any other action we take is going to be useful, we need to take this one. And sometimes, it can be really freaking difficult.

We need to shut up and listen.

“Black lives matter” means — among many other things — that black voices matter. So white people need to listen to those black voices. In person and online, with friends and colleagues and friends-of-friends and in-laws and strangers, wherever there are conversations about racism, white people need to listen.

And listening means not talking.

It doesn’t mean “jumping in with arguments about topics we know little about.” It doesn’t mean “waiting patiently until the other person has stopped talking, so we can say whatever we were going to say anyway.” It doesn’t mean “making the conversation all about us and our hurt feelings over being told we said something racist.” It doesn’t mean “constantly changing the subject away from racism and towards something we’re more comfortable with — like how black people are being mean to us, or how we’d be more likely to listen if they spoke more pleasantly.” It doesn’t mean “telling black people how to run their movement” or “telling black people how to talk to white people” — especially when that advice is almost always “tone it down,” “be easier to deal with,” and “don’t make us feel bad.”

Listening means just that — listening. It means letting the other person have the floor. It means letting the other person decide the topic and set the tone. It means that whatever talking we do is peripheral, done in service of understanding and amplifying. And sometimes — much of the time — it means shutting our mouths, and opening our minds.

White people in the U.S. are brought up to expect a lot — often without realizing it, often without even realizing that these expectations exist and that people who aren’t white expect very different things. (If you’re in doubt about this, go read White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack by Peggy McIntosh — or, for a funnier version of the same idea, Product Review: The Invisible Backpack of White Privilege from L.L. Bean by Joyce Miller.) And one of the things we expect most is an audience. We expect to have the floor. We expect that when we talk, people will listen. We expect that our ideas will be taken seriously; that any disagreement will be respectful and deferential; that we’ll be treated as authoritative, even when we’re talking out of our asses.

We expect that our voices will matter.

But you know what? In this national conversation about racism, our voices don’t matter so much. They’re not completely trivial — for one thing, we should be talking with other white people when they’re being racist — but they’re peripheral. They’re not what’s really important.

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Black people know a whole lot more about racism than white people do. Black people know more about racist policing, and racist police brutality. Black people know more about racism in employment, education, fiscal policy, election policy, drug policy, prison policy, urban planning, labor laws. Black people know more about microaggressions, the small pieces of unconscious racism they encounter every day, dozens of times a day, from the day they’re conscious until the day they die. Black people, and other people of color, are the experts in racism — in a way that white people will never be.

And maybe more to the point: This national conversation about racism? It’s about black people. It’s about black lives, black experiences. It’s not about us — except in the ways that we affect black people, and other people of color.

For white folks, this is a huge reversal. Again: We are brought up with the unconscious, unexamined expectation that our experiences are the ones that matter — and the lives of black people and other people of color only matter when they affect us. For a quick and dirty demonstration, look at popular culture. Look at how often black actors play supporting roles, while white actors get the lead. Look at how often entire casts are overwhelmingly white, with just a handful (at best) of black actors or other actors of color. Look at how white characters across films and stories are varied and multi-dimensional, while black ones largely fall into a handful of tropes. Look at the absurdly common trope of the Magical Negro (seriously, look it up), swooping in with their uncanny wisdom to fix the white hero’s life. The message gets hammered in again and again: White lives matter, and black lives don’t, except when they affect white lives.

Well, guess what? In this national conversation about racism, white voices are not the ones that matter. It’s not just that we aren’t the experts. It’s not just that black people and other people of color know way more about racism than we do. It’s that this conversation is not about us. We are the supporting cast this time — and we need to listen to the leads.

Here are a few specific ways to listen.

Between the World and Me book cover
We can read books and articles by black authors.

We can follow black writers and activists on social media.

When people on social media link to writing by black writers — we can read it. We can click on the actual article, and not just read the headline. We can read the whole piece, not just the first paragraph. If we haven’t read the whole piece, we can hold off on coming to conclusions and shooting our mouths off.

When a unfamiliar concept comes up in a conversation about race — we can Google it.

We can accept that we have racist ideas — all of us, every single one — and not react with “I’m not a racist, how dare you say that!” when someone points one of them out.

If a black person says something about race that we don’t agree with — instead of arguing, we can ask. Instead of jumping in with “That’s wrong, WRONG WRONG WRONG, I don’t know about that or understand it so it can’t be right,” we can ask: “I’m not familiar with that idea or fact — can you please explain it, or point me to a resource that explains it?”

If a black person says something about race that we don’t agree with, we can ask — but we can also not expect them to educate us on demand. We can understand how exhausting and demoralizing it can be to do Racism 101, a dozen times a day, every day, for a lifetime. We can acknowledge that doing Racism 101 is not an obligation, and when black people decide to do it with us, they’re doing us a favor. We can ask — and accept if the answer is, “I am not in the mood, here’s a nice Racism 101 resource” — or even, “I am not in the mood, do your own damn Googling.” We can understand that our desire to be educated, on demand, at the very moment we want it, by the exact person we want it from, does not take priority over black people’s desire to talk about what they want, when they want, with whom they want. Again — we can understand that this is not about us.

If we’re talking about racism, we can share and quote black voices.

If we’re protesting in the streets, and reporters try to talk with us, we can say, “This isn’t about me. This is about black lives. Talk with them.”

If we’re criticized in a conversation about racism, we can listen to the content, and let go of the tone it was said in. We can recognize that the conversation is not about us, and that our hurt feelings over being told “You said something racist” are not as important as, you know, racism.

If we’re criticized in a conversation about racism, we can think about the content, before we respond to it. Instead of reacting immediately, we can stop talking, think, look things up, talk with other people, think some more, and let ourselves cool off, before we respond.

If we’re criticized in a conversation about racism, we can consider whether we need to respond at all, with anything other than, “Sorry,” or even, “I’m not sure I agree, but I’m listening, let me think about that.” We can remember that our opinions are not the most important thing.

We can quit responding to critiques of racism with “Lighten up,” “You’re being too sensitive,” or “That’s so PC.” That is literally saying to black people, “The things that matter to you don’t matter to me. They shouldn’t matter to anyone. They don’t matter to anyone — they only matter to black people, and black people don’t count.” (Also, as humanists and rationalists, we should note that as debate points, “Lighten up,” “You’re being too sensitive,” and “That’s so PC” are entirely lacking in content. All they say is “That isn’t important and I’m going to dismiss it” — while dodging the actual point.)

And whenever this is uncomfortable or painful or upsetting, we can remember — did I mention this already? — that this is not about us. We can remember that as upsetting as these conversations might be for us, racism is a thousand times worse. We can remember that white people have been the protagonists, the center of attention, for centuries — and we can let these conversations be about, you know, the people they’re actually about.

I get that this can be hard. We all think of ourselves as the center of our own universes, and we all want things to be about us. And humanists especially love to talk. We love dialogue, debate, the free and open examination and questioning of ideas. I love those things, too. But if we care about racism — and if we’re humanists, we bloody well better — we need to care about justice, human rights, ethics, and compassion, more than we care about the sound of our own voices.

And in this national conversation about racism, that means shutting up and listening.

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

The Part About Black Lives Mattering Where White People Shut Up and Listen

More Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Dawkins or Harris: Jenn Ramirez

In June, I wrote a piece for AlterNet, titled 8 Awesome Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Richard Dawkins or Sam Harris. The gist: When a media outlet decides that atheism is important, they all too often turn to Richard Dawkins or Sam Harris. Then, when Dawkins or Harris puts their foot in their mouth about race or gender — again — the reporter cries out, “Atheism needs better leadership! Why doesn’t atheism have better leaders?” Atheism does have better leaders — so I profiled eight of them, to bring just a small fragment of the range and variety of atheist leadership to more people’s attention.

At the end of that piece, I wrote, “And these eight are the tip of the iceberg… I could write a new profile of a different atheist leader every week, and still be at it ten years from now.”

So I decided: Why not do that?

I don’t know if I’ll do it for ten years. But for at least a while, once a week I’ll be profiling and interviewing a different leader in organized atheism.

This week’s profile: Jenn Ramirez.

GC: Tell me briefly what your organization does and what you do for them. (If you’re in a leadership position with more than one atheist organization, feel free to tell me about more than one.)

Jenn Ramirez with watermark 200
JR: I am an organizer for the Riverside Atheists and Free Thinkers, also known as RAFT. We are a grassroots organization dedicated to building community for non-believers in the Inland Empire of Southern California. We hold various events such as dinners, pub nights, chess nights, family picnics, charity events, as well as our very popular monthly speaker series. Additionally, we are staunch advocates for the separation of church and state, and you will often find us engaging in various outreach activities and demonstrating when necessary.

Tell me about a specific project or projects your organization is working on.

RAFT is currently working on our Charity Beyond Belief 2015: Winter Survival Packs for the Homeless campaign. From October to December, members of RAFT (or anyone) can come to any meetup and either provide a monetary donation or a specific item from a list provided. We will then come together in November and build these special packs containing blankets, sweaters, lotion, chapstick and other necessities to survive the winter. In December, we will go out as a group to one of our local parks and distribute them. As of right now, we already have one member who is committed to donating over a dozen blankets and sweaters for this cause and have already received some amazing donations. This event was very successful last year and I anticipate that RAFT will be able to contribute more this year.

Where would you like to see organized atheism go in the next 10 to 20 years?

I hope we continue to build more organizations and communities that advocate for non-believers and the separation of church and state. I also hope we can continue to work together to break down the misconceptions about non-believers. But one of the biggest things I’d like to see is more diversity in the movement. It’s important to see more women, the LGBTQIA community, and people of color stepping up in leadership roles. I think that is going to have a big impact in our movement overall.

What do you think are the main challenges facing organized atheism now?

I think like any group that gets organized, one of our biggest problems is infighting. We see it a lot in the atheist community and we have to remember that we have goals in mind. And we can’t reach these goals if we can’t work together. For smaller groups like mine, money is definitely an issue. So many organizers pay for the groups out of pocket to make the events successful. It would be nice to see that change one day.

Do you consider yourself a “new atheist”? Why or why not?

I consider myself many things and I imagine I fall along the line of a “new atheist” because I am so outspoken. I am a feminist atheist focused on building community for non-believers while addressing social justice issues.

Any questions you wish I’d asked, or anything else you’d like to add?

RAFT group at restaurant
I’d like to reach out to anyone who is thinking of joining a local atheist group and say, DO IT. Get out there, meet other like minded individuals, be prepared to be challenged, but most of all know how important community really is. So many of us have lost so much due to our non-belief and we need a safe place to be ourselves. Get active, be supportive, and know that it can be absolutely worth it. Here are a few links to our group:

Our meetup: http://www.meetup.com/Riverside-Atheists-and-FreeThinkers/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RiversideAtheistsAndFreeThinkers/
Website: http://riversideatheists.com/#/

I also want to give a big shout out to my RAFT crew! I am so grateful to each and every one of you for all of your hard work, dedication and support. Thank you!

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

More Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Dawkins or Harris: Jenn Ramirez

Godless Perverts Social Club in Oakland Thursday, October 15!

Godless-Perverts-Social-Club-Oakland-October-2015-Blog

Join Godless Perverts for another night of godless talk about sexuality, gender, and all the issues that tie them together at Telegraph in Oakland. It’ll be an open discussion night, so bring any thoughts or questions you have with you.

How to Find Us

We’ll be meeting in the back room behind the bar, so we’ll have a separate, somewhat private-ish space to talk about sex and blasphemy and whatnot. Telegraph has lots of food options, mostly in the sandwich/ sausage/ burger family, and including many vegetarian and vegan options. They have a wide selection of beers, and they also have soft drinks for those who don’t drink alcohol. (It is a bar, which means you need to be at least 21 to attend.) Admission is free, but we ask that you buy food and/or drink if you can.

Godless Perverts: Our Policies on Building Safer Spaces

All orientations, genders, and kinks (or lack thereof) are welcome. Community is one of the reasons we started Godless Perverts. There are few enough places to land when you decide that you’re an atheist; far fewer if you’re also LGBT, queer, kinky, poly, trans, or are just interested in sexuality. And the sex-positive/ alt-sex/ whatever- you- want- to- call- it community isn’t always the most welcoming place for non-believers. So please join us! We’ll meet on the third Thursday of every month in Oakland: we’ll also still meet in San Francisco at Wicked Grounds, on the first Tuesday of every month.

Godless Perverts presents and promotes a positive view of sexuality without religion, by and for sex-positive atheists, agnostics, humanists, and other non-believers, through performance events, panel discussions, social gatherings, media productions, and other appropriate outlets. Our events and media productions present depictions, explorations, and celebrations of godless sexualities — including positive, traumatic, and complex experiences — focusing on the intersections of sexuality with atheism, materialism, skepticism, and science, as well as critical, questioning, mocking, or blasphemous views of sex and religion.

Godless Perverts is committed to feminism, diversity, inclusivity, and social justice. We seek to create safe and welcoming environments for all non-believers and believing allies who are respectful of the mission, and are committed to taking positive action to achieve this. Please let the moderators or other people in charge of any event know if you encounter harassment, racism, misogyny, transphobia, or other problems at our events.

If you want to be notified about all our Godless Perverts events, sign up for our email mailing list, or follow us on Twitter at @GodlessPerverts. You can also sign up for the Bay Area Atheists/ Agnostics/ Humanists/ Freethinkers/ Skeptics Meetup page, and be notified of all sorts of godless Bay Area events — including the Godless Perverts. And of course, you can always visit our Website to find out what we’re up to, godlessperverts.com. Hope to see you soon!

Godless Perverts Social Club in Oakland Thursday, October 15!

What You’re Saying When You Use the Phrase “Politically Correct”

“Warning — I’m going to say some things here that aren’t politically correct.”

Or, “Oh, I’d better be careful, I might upset the PC police.”

Or, in response to a complaint about bigotry and discrimination and dehumanization, “They’re just being politically correct, I’m so sick of all that PC nonsense.”

I hear this a lot. I hear it from writers, speakers, politicians, commentators, comedians. And I don’t just hear it from overtly douchey asshats. I also hear it from people who are generally smart, thoughtful, decent, and clearly wanting to do good.

hexagonal-warning-sign
I hear this a lot. And whenever I hear it, it’s like a red flag. It’s like a red flag attached to sirens and klaxons and flashing red lights. It’s like a guy on the side of the road jumping around with a giant sign — a sign that says, “This person is about to say something incredibly screwed-up.”

When you use the phrase “politically correct,” here’s what you’re saying.

You’re saying, “I want to be able to say things that are damaging — and I don’t want to be held accountable for it.”

You’re saying, “I don’t want to have to think very carefully about the things that I’m saying. I want to say whatever pops into my head — and I don’t want to think about whether it’s unfair, inaccurate, bigoted, or otherwise harmful.”

You’re saying, “I want to say whatever pops into my head — and I don’t want to think about whether it perpetuates harmful tropes or stereotypes.”

You’re saying, “In particular, I want to say whatever pops into my head about people who’ve gotten the short end of the stick for centuries — and I don’t want to think about whether the things I say are bashing them with that stick one more goddamn time.”

You’re saying, “When people speak up about bigotry and discrimination and dehumanization, I don’t want to have to think about the actual content of what they’re saying.”

You’re saying, “When people speak up about bigotry and discrimination and dehumanization, I’m not going to engage with the content of what they’re saying — I’m just going to dismiss it wholesale.”

You’re saying, “When people speak up about bigotry and discrimination and dehumanization, I’m not only going to dismiss what they’re saying — I’m going to trivialize the very idea of them speaking about it and asking people to change.”

get out of jail free card
You’re saying, “Rather than actually thinking carefully about the things I’m saying, I’m just going to say whatever I feel like, and tack on this ‘PC’ line as a Get Out of Jail Free card.”

You’re saying, “I want to be able to say things that are damaging — and I don’t just want to avoid accountability. I actually want to be seen as brave and heroic.”

You’re saying, “I want to be able to say things that are damaging — and I want to be seen as a champion for free speech.”

You’re saying, “I want to be able to say things that are damaging — and I want to act like a martyr when I get called on it.”

If you don’t want to be saying any of that — don’t use the phrase “politically correct.”

The phrase is supposed to act as a shield, a Get Out of Jail Free card. But for me — and for many other people — it does the opposite. It’s not a shield. It’s an alert. It’s a giant red arrow, saying, “Heads up! This person is probably going to say some seriously douchey bigoted bullshit — so prick up your ears and listen carefully for it.”

Look. I get that this stuff can be hard. I completely understand the feeling of walking on eggshells in a minefield. I get that if you’re going to talk about important, difficult, heavily-loaded topics, you’re eventually going to say something wrong-headed or piss people off. And I get that people want to talk about important, difficult, heavily-loaded topics anyway. I not only get that — I support it. I don’t want every writer, speaker, politician, commentator, comedian, to spend all their time talking about the weather.

Yes, you show courage when you walk into the minefield. But that courage is eradicated when you use “I guess I’m not being very PC here” as a shield. When you walk into the minefield and you step on a mine, the shrapnel can hurt people other than you. It’s not very brave to use the “I guess I’m not being PC” shield to protect yourself from that shrapnel. And it’s seriously not brave to deflect that shrapnel onto the people who live their entire lives in that minefield, and whose bodies and minds are carrying scars from every other mine that exploded onto them, and who live in constant expectation of the next explosion.

So take responsibility for your words, and for their effect. If you screw up and hurt people you didn’t intend to hurt — cop to it. Apologize. And do better next time. Don’t turn the people you hurt into the bad guys, the so-called PC police who don’t want anyone to make jokes or think original thoughts or have any fun at all — simply because they told you that you screwed up.

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

What You’re Saying When You Use the Phrase “Politically Correct”

Greta Speaking in Atlanta This Weekend, at Atheist Alliance of America Conference!

I have a speaking gig coming this weekend, in Atlanta at the Atheist Alliance of America conference. If you’re in the area, I hope to see you there!

CITY: Atlanta, GA (Atheist Alliance of America conference)
DATES: October 15-18
EVENT: Atheist Alliance of America conference
TOPIC: Atheism and Sexuality
SUMMARY: The sexual morality of traditional religion tends to be based, not on solid ethical principles, but on a set of taboos about what kinds of sex God does and doesn’t want people to have. And while the sex-positive community offers a more thoughtful view of sexual morality, it still often frames sexuality as positive by seeing it as a spiritual experience. What are some atheist alternatives to these views? How can atheists view sexual ethics without a belief in God? And how can atheists view sexual transcendence without a belief in the supernatural?
LOCATION: Crowne Plaza Hotel, 1325 Virginia Avenue, Atlanta, GA
HOST: Atheist Alliance of America
OTHER SPEAKERS: Bria Crutchfield, Jeffrey Tayler, Miri Mogilevsky, Monette Richards, Matt Facciani, David Diskin, Richard Haynes, Phil Ferguson, Sarah Morehead, Lucien Greaves, Stephanie Guttormson, Dale McGowan, Mandisa Thomas, Shawn Jeffers, Inna Shevchenko, more
COST: $179 – $500: single-day tickets available for $100; single-event tickets available for $20 – $50; discounted rate for students available Oct. 1
EVENT URL: atheistallianceamerica.org/conference/2015-overview

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

Greta Speaking in Atlanta This Weekend, at Atheist Alliance of America Conference!

More Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Dawkins or Harris: Amy Davis Roth

In June, I wrote a piece for AlterNet, titled 8 Awesome Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Richard Dawkins or Sam Harris. The gist: When a media outlet decides that atheism is important, they all too often turn to Richard Dawkins or Sam Harris. Then, when Dawkins or Harris puts their foot in their mouth about race or gender — again — the reporter cries out, “Atheism needs better leadership! Why doesn’t atheism have better leaders?” Atheism does have better leaders — so I profiled eight of them, to bring just a small fragment of the range and variety of atheist leadership to more people’s attention.

At the end of that piece, I wrote, “And these eight are the tip of the iceberg… I could write a new profile of a different atheist leader every week, and still be at it ten years from now.”

So I decided: Why not do that?

I don’t know if I’ll do it for ten years. But for at least a while, once a week I’ll be profiling and interviewing a different leader in organized atheism.

This week’s profile: Amy Davis Roth.

GC: Tell me briefly what your organization does and what you do for them. (If you’re in a leadership position with more than one atheist organization, feel free to tell me about more than one.)

Amy Davis Roth
ADR: I am the founder and organizing leader of the Los Angeles Women’s Atheist and Agnostic Group. LAWAAG for short. http://lawaag.com LAWAAG is a group that was created to foster friendship and support amongst women who are either atheist or agnostic or in the process of leaving religion. It was created during a time when atheist women online were the main target of online harassment (prior to the gamergate fiasco) and my group was intended, and still is, a safe space for people who primarily identify as women who don’t have a church to go to. I feel that often churches provide really fabulous social and support groups for women but that the atheist community doesn’t much offer that same sort of space specifically for women to find friendship when they feel isolated. I wanted to create something like that for the women in my area. There are a lot of atheist groups in Los Angeles but there was nothing out there specifically for fostering friendship where women’s voices and specific concerns could be focused upon. The group sometimes has speakers come and give talks and when we do we open the group up to all genders and generally have the event at CFI Los Angeles or a public library, but recently we have shifted to doing more directly empowering and culturally educational events that allows us to get together and spend more time getting to know one another, learn a thing or two about the women who visit, and have food and build friendships. For example, we recently started a book club where we read books primarily written by women and then we have an afternoon potluck at my art studio to share our feelings on the literature. We have food and we listen to music and we talk and laugh. Last month we read Their Eyes Were Watching God by Nora Neale Hurston and next up is Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic by Allison Bechdel. We are also starting Movie Nights in the Fall that will be similar to the book club. You can find these meetups and the others we plan by either joining our meetup page: http://www.meetup.com/LAWAAG/ or our Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/lawaag/ I don’t want LAWAAG to be just another atheist group where people complain about religion. I want to move past that and pay attention to things that matter to actual people going forward, when atheism is no longer a novelty, like social support, friendship, art and education.

I am also a longtime contributor to the blog Skepchick (skepchick.org), a blog about skepticism, feminism and atheism that is primarily focused on women’s issues. I am also the managing editor of Mad Art Lab (madartab.com), a blog on the Skepchick network that is about the intersection of art, science, skepticism and geek culture.

In recent years Skepchick has become more focused on issues surrounding feminism for good reason, but this month I am starting a series called Skepticism 101. It will be a series of posts that brings the site back to its roots of being a site that explains skepticism and is skeptical of claims made about and directed at women. My series will be a very basic overview of the theory of skepticism and critical thinking meant to help new people who aren’t necessarily familiar with the basic concepts. As we get older and become more educated I think we forget that there are younger versions of us out there in the world that could use a little help understanding concepts that to us are obvious, but could really help someone who doesn’t yet understand.

Tell me about a specific project or projects your organization is working on.

Answered above.

Where would you like to see organized atheism go in the next 10 to 20 years?

I would hope that organized atheism becomes more inclusive of people of color, women and other oppressed groups. Right now the culture of atheism puts forward a very white and very cis male face. Atheism often seems to be a white man’s game of arguing until he feels he is right without regard to the ramifications that brings or who he crushes below him. A lot of us saw this play out with the “Elevatorgate” controversy. I want atheism to be something that is not shocking and not needing be constantly argued so that we can move past that and build community, social structure and government that is based on rationality and compassion with science-based information at its core instead of the current mythologies. I want women and those whose voices are often unfairly silenced to matter in this scenario and to be respected equally.

What do you think are the main challenges facing organized atheism now?

I think atheism looks like an uncaring male-centric game right now. Not only do religious people consider it an affront to all they hold sacred but some of us who are living secular lifestyles do not want to align themselves with many of the current leaders, like Dawkins and Sam Harris. I know a lot of women who, in the past few years, walked away from organized atheism because they found it literally terrifying online, exclusionary at events and basically rotten from the core. In my eyes, atheism as a political movement has a huge PR problem and needs to be more inclusive and representative of society as a whole. In order to be that way, it needs to fix its women and bigotry problems first.

Do you consider yourself a “new atheist”? Why or why not?

I am not a new atheist if that means in any way that I want to fight with people online or debate religion through anger or while toting or quoting The God Delusion. I was raised without religion and I don’t hold any anger towards the religious people around me. I think religion is based only on myth and certainly does harm, but I do not fault people who search out the support and safety it brings for many. There are more reasons that religions are popular in our society than simply what is taught in the pages of holy books. I obviously don’t condone any racist, violent or misogynistic aspects of religion but I think education is the way to end the hold of this mythology on our culture and not by militant anger.

Any questions you wish I’d asked, or anything else you’d like to add?

This is what an atheist looks like Surly Amy necklace
I am an artist who makes a living through my art and that is what enables me to continue doing all the work I do for free like writing for the blogs and running my women’s atheist group. If you can find even a dollar a month to support my Patreon, that is an ongoing art project inspired by science and peer reviewed by actual scientists, I would forever be grateful. Here is the link to that: https://www.patreon.com/SurlyAmy I am also the creator of Surly-Ramics. You can find out more about my handmade jewelry that is inspired by science and nature by going here: http://surlyramics.com

Image of Surly Amy necklace published with permission from the artist.

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

More Atheist Leaders Who Aren’t Dawkins or Harris: Amy Davis Roth

Greta Speaking in Sacramento This Weekend, and Atlanta Next Weekend!

I have speaking gigs coming up soon — in Sacramento at their annual Freethought Day festival this weekend, and in Atlanta at the Atheist Alliance of American conference. If you’re in those areas, I hope to see you there!

CITY: Sacramento, CA (Sacramento Freethought Day)
DATE: Sunday, October 11, 11:00 am – 6:30 pm (plus Volunteer Dinner Thursday October 8, Leadership Day and Supporters’ Reception Saturday October 10)
EVENT: Sacramento Freethought Day, an outdoor festival with family activities, exhibitor booths, author booths, and more
TOPIC: I’m giving a short talk on Doing my Best as part of the Sunday Assembly, which is kicking off the day’s activities. I’m also on the Author’s and Podcasters’ Panel, with Richard Carrier, David Fitzgerald, and Brendan Powell Smith
LOCATION: Capitol Building, Sacramento, CA
HOST: Sacramento Freethought Day Committee
OTHER SPEAKERS: Mandisa Thomas, Chris Johnson, Victor Harris, Jason Torpy, Lyz Liddell, Amanda Metskas, Tom Manger, Jason Heap, Bill Potts
COST: Free – $135 (special goodies available for different price levels, but the event is totally free)
EVENT URL: freethoughtday.org

CITY: Atlanta, GA (Atheist Alliance of America conference)
DATES: October 15-18
EVENT: Atheist Alliance of America conference
TOPIC: Atheism and Sexuality
SUMMARY: The sexual morality of traditional religion tends to be based, not on solid ethical principles, but on a set of taboos about what kinds of sex God does and doesn’t want people to have. And while the sex-positive community offers a more thoughtful view of sexual morality, it still often frames sexuality as positive by seeing it as a spiritual experience. What are some atheist alternatives to these views? How can atheists view sexual ethics without a belief in God? And how can atheists view sexual transcendence without a belief in the supernatural?
LOCATION: Crowne Plaza Hotel, 1325 Virginia Avenue, Atlanta, GA
HOST: Atheist Alliance of America
OTHER SPEAKERS: Bria Crutchfield, Jeffrey Tayler, Miri Mogilevsky, Monette Richards, Matt Facciani, David Diskin, Richard Haynes, Phil Ferguson, Sarah Morehead, Lucien Greaves, Stephanie Guttormson, Dale McGowan, Mandisa Thomas, Shawn Jeffers, Inna Shevchenko, more
COST: $179 – $500: single-day tickets available for $100; single-event tickets available for $20 – $50; discounted rate for students available Oct. 1
EVENT URL: atheistallianceamerica.org/conference/2015-overview

Comforting Thoughts book cover oblong 100 JPG
Coming Out Atheist
Bending
why are you atheists so angry
Greta Christina is author of four books: Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.

Greta Speaking in Sacramento This Weekend, and Atlanta Next Weekend!