I had the start of this poem floating around in my head, keeping me from sleep. I decided to write it down and see where it went.
In my dreams,
We sit beneath the red glow of the Chinese lanterns at midnight.
Their warmth reflecting off the sea dampened red bricks of Chinatown
Each droplet a trapped star.
In my heart,
I feel the warmth of your arms.
I feel your breath against my hair.
I feel your strength at my back,
In your shoulders,
In the heat of your presence
Here with me.
Like the sun catching in your hair,
Or the spark of the fire we sit and watch.
If I could grow wings, I would fly to you in a moment.
A word so full of meaning
So little understood.
More than a word, but a silence.
The silence of my fears when I am with you.
The silence of my mind as I don’t parse your words like a prospector parses river mud, hoping to catch a gleam of something more – finding only fool’s gold.
Like the mountain rivers and lakes that make up your world sparkle with clarity – deep mirrors into the forests of your soul.
Of my soul.
How I yearn to run through those forests at your side.
I see a house – more than that,
A place where we both belong
In a world that tried to make us feel like we didn’t,
Not knowing that the emptiness we felt
Wasn’t the emptiness of being alone
But simply the silence waiting to be filled with your voice.
Not my other half, but my partner.
The voice that melds with mine in the night sky and sings out that here…
The distance between us
… a curse.
Only now, I have hope.
For I have heard your voice on the night air,
Beneath the warm red glow of the lamps,
Like the warm glow of my heart.
I have felt the tempering heat of you,
Burning away the last of my fear,
Leaving me shining steel.
Sharpened by pain.
Hammered by cruelty and betrayal.
But finally, tempered in love and trust.
Not a trust in eternity
A trust in the truth of two voices,
Twined together in the night
Under a blue moon.