On a Break Before I Break

Yeeeeeah. I’m ready to close my Facebook, Twitter, and even my Tumblr tags for a bit.

For about two weeks.  I have a Frivolous Friday planned for next week, and will probably stick to those until the break is done because boy oh boy oh boy do I need to focus on something, ANYTHING, that isn’t social justice or trying to make the world a better place through my unique form of “blog-yelling”, as one recently blocked commenter called it. 🙂

I will also be moderating comments, of course.

You can check out my fellow co-bloggers for some awesomeness while I’m gone.

Be excellent to each other until I return and we can be mocking and snarky together.

Especially since I just purchased a certain book

On a Break Before I Break

Frivolous Friday: The Fashion Edition

Okay, I might be cheating a little because this has something to do with social justice, but roll with me here.

Continue reading “Frivolous Friday: The Fashion Edition”

Frivolous Friday: The Fashion Edition

Accepting Help From Objects

One day, it was finally clear to me.

I couldn’t do this shit by myself anymore.

What couldn’t I do?  This is going to sound pathetic, but it was putting on socks.

I would haul one leg over the other and struggle, then throw the other leg over and ugh…

Don’t even get me started on tights. Or boots.

Washing my own feet in the shower (never a bath, because I’d never be able to get out of the tub without help) is nearly impossible.

See, it took me a bit to realize that I would need my cane if I was going to be walking or standing a lot. It took me even longer to realize that getting a disability placard was a good idea. Same with bring a folding chair when I go to escort (and actually using it). Asking my partner to carry my laundry basket to the basement still bothers me.

But this? Basic activities of daily living? It’s embarrassing. I’m embarrassed to write this. But, just as I’m getting over it to keep typing, I had to get over it if I wanted my life to be less of a struggle.

So I got this a few months ago from Amazon.


Yep. I got a doohicky to help me put on my socks and tights.  Works pretty good, too.

I also got this at the same time.

grabby thing

No more having to ask my partner to reach under/over/behind most things, especially shit I manage to knock over. We already had a long shoe horn, I just had to ask for it and actually use it.

There are a few more things I need to get that I didn’t even know were available to help me: a foot scrubby thing that sticks to the tub floor, a loofah long enough to scrub one’s back, a pumice stone on a long handle.

It’s rough admitting this shit. I’ll have to update the form that my rhumatologist makes me fill out before each appointment that asks me if I need assistance with this basic shit. I’ve always said “no”, when it was increasingly a lie. Hell, when I was asked to join The Orbit, I had to confess that I needed a harder push to get shit done, because I’m just not good at prioritizing the important stuff due to executive dysfunction issues. Getting over my pride and actually telling people I need help with my disabilities is hard.

But it’s necessary if I want to have a life. And for you, if you’re reading these words and wondering “Should I get this/ask for that?”.


Accepting Help From Objects

Erykah Badu is an Apologist for Child Rapists

…and you have no idea how difficult writing that title is.

Content Warning for Obvious Reasons

Continue reading “Erykah Badu is an Apologist for Child Rapists”

Erykah Badu is an Apologist for Child Rapists

Frivolous Fridays: Skulls, Skulls and More Skulls

Guess who’s kinda sorta maybe back?

(or guess who’s having an epic nap after this)

I missed last week’s FF due to being really, really down as fuck, but I couldn’t miss it twice in a row, especially since I get to share with everyone one of my favorite things!


No really.  I love skulls. They contain your brain! They’re creepy without being super gory! They’re awesome! Before moving to MN, I didn’t have any reason to really collect anything, because given how often I moved around, collectible anything was just more stuff that took room away from some more clothes or a toiletry or shoes.

But now that I’ve been here nearly five years this month, I’ve had the time to really get into something I’ve really like.  And with my latent goth tastes, Halloween is my favorite time to shop for anything, and skulls are perfect (so are spiders, but my collection of those is rather small, and I know too many people with arachnophobia to show those pictures). I may be a little obsessed, because you see:

I wear them to bed!!

Three pairs of sleep pants lay overlapping on a bedsheet. All are black with skull motifs.


I wear them outside!

A pair of black leggings with white skulls


I wear them around my neck or in my hair!

Black scarf with white skull and crossbones

I wear them on my ears and around my neck (again)!

One pair of earrings with black skulls, another pair with silver skulls, and a silver choker with skulls

And lastly, but not least-ly, my collection of skull shaped whatzits and whozits: Candles and tiny bottles and a cat collar and a vampire skull and some other stuff.


Frivolous Fridays: Skulls, Skulls and More Skulls

Cat Toy Update: Holy Shit, Thank You!!!

So, I got a box today with two slow feeder bowls, then checked the Amazon list.

Every. Single. Thing.

Every single thing on the list is in this office currently as I’m typing this.

Holy shit. Fuck me running. My heart’s beating really fast. I expected to get one, maybe two, probably none, but ALL?  ALL?


A man limps down a hallway with "What the Shit" written below
…my second favorite ME character using my second favorite phrase

First off, THANK YOU to everyone who retweet, reposted, passed around, sent by carrier pigeon that post. You all rock so hard for this.

Secondly, double stuffed THANK YOU to everyone who was going to send something, but couldn’t because the list was already sold out. Also to everyone who wanted to send something, but couldn’t for whatever reason.  Grab a guitar, because you also rock.

And Lastly, super sized with a side of fries THANK YOU to the awesome, hella awesome, ridiculously awesome folks who sent me all of these lovely things.  All of you get Niki awesome points that will never expire:

  • Iris
  • Monica
  • Olivia


(not listing last names because it’s the internet duh)

A large worm-like creature jumps and tackles a spider-like machine

I can’t thank you enough.  Weasel can’t thank you enough. Even Sammy can’t thank you, and he’s a grump.

But enough thank yous. I know what you’re all here for: Action Shots! Lots of sideways Action shots!

Two boxes, one small stacked on a larger one
It was Christmas up in here
A tan colored cat sits on a blue fabric bag.
Sammy finds the crinkle bag and the catnip mousey adequate.
A cream colored cat sits upon a blue fabric bag.
…and so did Weasel (the crinkle bag; he doesn’t seem too fond of the mousey)
Cream colored cat, batting into a green upright cat feeder with a white base
It took Weasel some days to get the hang of the new feeder, poor thing.
Cream colored cat standing up on the green feeder.
And then the little fucker started cheating.
Cream colored cat in mid spin with a feather toy on his back.
The only one who got worn out after this was HIM.
Cream colored cat sitting inside of a cardboard box
And of course, the best cat toy ever – the box

The toys that were sent by not photo’d are because Sammy love the mouse on a stick, but wouldn’t stay still enough for me to take a shot, and we got the metal slow feeders today.

Wow, I’m still overwhelmed, but I couldn’t get a day go by without thanking everyone, from me and the kitties.

Cream colored cat laying on a blue desk with a three skull candle holder nearby
Pictured: One tuckered out kittimus.
Cat Toy Update: Holy Shit, Thank You!!!

Help Me Play With My Cat

So, as I’ve mentioned before, I have multiple disabilities.

I also have a cat. His name is Weasel. And I am definitely his human.

Exhibit A
Exhibit A

He’s a Good Kitty, when he’s not walking over what feels like each and every sore spot on my body to wake me up (then he’s a Little Fucker). He’s a munchkin, but runs and jumps like no one told him his legs are shorter than the average cat’s. He’s got Siamese in him, so he’s talky.  He loves to ‘lead’ me to the office and bedroom, waits for me by the bathroom door, and when I’m tired, he naps right beside me. And like most cats, he needs playtime, stimulation and all that.

Which I would love to provide, but as the years go on, I’m less able to play with him without getting exhausted or sore (one of his favorite things is for one of us dragging a bit of string around for him to chase and catch, you see).  And when he’s bored, he sleeps a great deal more and finds things to gnaw on that I’d rather him not gnaw on: plastic bags, my compression bags, the vacuum bags we use to store the big blanket away, plastic cereal bags, plastic this, plastic that, you get the picture.

And when he wants to play and I can’t, the meows are so pitiful that it breaks my heart.

So, after observing the sorts of things he likes to do, I put together a wishlist of toys that I think he’ll enjoy, and two food bowls so he and the resident Old and Grumpy Cat Sammy don’t get into too many fights during meal time. But I’m broke.

I’m reaching out to y’all to help my short fuzzy boy out.  Here’s the link. I’m not asking for everything on the list at once, so you can do whatever you can, that would be great.

Thanks in advance,

Niki M and Weasel

....and Weasel thanks you too!

Help Me Play With My Cat

I Like Cards Against Humanity

(EDIT: psst, hey y’all, did you know that two of my fellow contributors have their own CAH expansion?  No?  Well, get yer ass to this link and check it out)


No really, I do.  I know it’s become popular now to hate on the game and call it not funny or trying too hard at being “edgy”, and they’re right. I’m not going to really argue with those views, and I’m not trying to convince anyone who’s done with the game or never want to give it a try.

But me? I love it all the same. I love getting together with friends, having a few drinks, and spending the evening indulging in laughs and dark humor. The company has done amazing things with the ridiculous amount of money they’ve earned with the sales, charities, selling nothing, selling literal shit, selling foot by foot plots on a protected island, giving their factory workers in China a week’s paid vacation, just awesome things. And I like supporting these efforts.

Yes this is definitely a case of “my fav is totes problematic” (more on that subject in another post), but the game is funny and can be a lot of fun – with caveats.

Playing with the unaltered deck is uncomfortable, to say the least. There are so many problematic cards in it.  “Hardworking Mexican”, use of the t-slur, shit about big black dicks, etc. A lot of the humor is based on vulgar edgelord “shock” value.

But there isn’t a rule that requires you to play with an unaltered deck. My friends who have decks, more geeky and socially aware, have custom ones (if you have never played with Miri’s uber deck of awesome, you have missed out on an experience). I have gone through my own and pulled out all the ones that make me cringe.  Some even allow for people to take out problematic cards during play. You can even create your own cards.  It’s great for in-jokes in groups, and it keeps the game fresh.

Do you want to refresh your deck further? Have some expansions, hell, have themed deck sets. Do you like Dr. Who, here you go.  There’s a My Little Pony deck in the online version (Pretend You’re Xyzzy). Like a more woman focused deck, Ladies Against Humanity has your back. Want to support a scholarship for women getting into STEM? There’s a science-based deck for that. Hell, there’s a Lieutenant who is working on a military version of this game.


image from ladiesagainsthumanity.tumblr.com
image from ladiesagainsthumanity.tumblr.com

And like any game, it really depends on who you play with.  I don’t play with a group I don’t know, because yeah, I might run the risk of having to uncomfortable-laugh my way through card after card after card. It’s the same deal with RPGs and poker.  You don’t want to play with that one person who throws a literal fit when their dice is being shitty that night.

And about the humor? I’ll admit, I love me some dark gallows humor sometimes.  The world sucks, especially if you’re “woke” and see the injustices in our society.  Sometimes I need to get together with like-minded people and make terrible jokes, awful groaners, and some amazing on the point winners. It’s a release value. It sticks a finger in the eye to those who say them darn Ess-Jay-Double Ewes don’t have a sense of humor. Most importantly, it’s fun.

So, yeah, I’m going to keep playing as long as I can find people to play with.

Anyone up for a game?


(Note: If you’re really done with CAH and want to try another sort of card game?  Try Slash. The ever awesome Greta and her ever awesome wife Ingrid introduced me to this game at Skepticon 8 – and it’s hilarious.)



I Like Cards Against Humanity