Most Certainly Not Haunted

For crap’s sake. How can anyone believe this Most Haunted? Or any other ghost hunting show, for that matter? It’s so obvious that the lady on the left is moving the table. Next time get a motorized table, or at least lose the tablecloth so you can’t tell as easily when your hand movements precede the table’s movements.

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Most Certainly Not Haunted
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10 thoughts on “Most Certainly Not Haunted

  1. 1

    Jason, what the hell? Didn’t you learn anything from the astrology thread(s)? Any minute now we’re going to be deluged by ghost hunters telling us, “the girl isn’t shoving the table: the ghost is pushing the table cloth against that girl’s hand!” “Don’t you realize that science doesn’t know everything?”, and “Something really scary happened to me when I was a child and therefore GHOSTS ARE REALSIES!!!1!”

    Then when you ask for some real evidence for the existence of ghosts you’ll be inundated by fuzzy photographs and night-vision video where something shocking happens just off of camera view or out of focus. Then when you insist that isn’t good enough, you’ll be informed that ghosts are really “just a way of understanding our fear of death and loss, and dammit, you skeptics must just need to get laid – why must you question everything you know-nothing, science fundamentalist, miserable jerks?!?” “You’re questioning of the reality of ghosts is just like when the Christians called people possessed and killed them! Stop trying to murder us believers!”

    (Heh, actually that was kinda fun!)

  2. 2

    You missed your calling as a poe, Sinned.

    I’m afraid with not having tagged some ghost hunting forum or whatnot, the chances of someone getting their hackles raised by this post is rather slim. Dunno if I want to put my hand into another blender so quickly, but it certainly did generate blogger-crack (e.g. comments) like no other endeavour I’ve done to date.

  3. 4

    I’m afraid with not having tagged some ghost hunting forum or whatnot, the chances of someone getting their hackles raised by this post is rather slim.

    That can be easily fixed, you know…

  4. 5

    Dunno if I want to put my hand into another blender so quickly…

    See now, this is exactly why you Canuckistanian pansies are going to be such easy peasy prey to American umperialism.

    Meanwhile, somewhere in Fucktardia, someone is reading sinned34’s comment and thinking that them fucking skeptical bastards are killing Ghosties and eating their babies. Probably thinking that this is a good thing, because the Satan worshiping fucks deserve it. Way to be sinned, way to be. Way to give us an even worse rap.

  5. 6

    Umperialism? Is that like forceably converting people to be umpires? The bagger at the grocery is suddenly demanding that the checkout worker throw their frozen juice “straight down the line”, then telling the customer that they’re “outta heeeeeere!!!”?

  6. 7

    DuWayne, that comment is a perfect replication of what Sarah Palin might post if she was, er… you. Of course, such enviable skill in replicating the ravings of a maddened wingnut means I can’t really figure out exactly what you’re trying to say, so, ummm… Are you saying that I’m making skeptics look bad, or making Ghosties look bad? Or both? Are you perchance suggesting that we slice open the eyeballs of the Christists and feast on the gooey substance that pours forth? Mayhaps I should check my bowl of alpha-bits in the morning for a translation of your doubtlessly prophetic words?

  7. 9

    Motherfucker, I don’t care if you are joking (you BETTER be joking), comparing me to Palin is just fucking low. For the record, I could totally go for the Christianists going to war with the ghosties, if it weren’t for the fact that rather than leaving us alone, they would come after atheisty skeptics too, because too many of them believe that atheist = satanist.

  8. 10

    Now, now. No need to be overly sensitive. I was pretty sure I knew what you meant, but I wanted to be absolutely sure. You’re usually a little more mother fucking elegant when you write, so I figured I’d toss a little gentle ribbing your way. We’re on the same side, last I checked. As a fellow atheist, I’ll sacrifice a kitten to Satan on my Altar Of The Dark Lord Dawkins (available at Urban Outfitters or Future Shop!) tonight as an act of contrition for offending thee.

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