So Love Me, Love Me, Love Me — I'm A Kittycat!

Greta Christina

So we were crooning to our cats the other day, as is our wont, and the line, “So love me, love me, love me — I’m a kittycat!” jumped into my head. At which point, of course, I couldn’t rest until the whole song was written.

So here it is. To the tune of Phil Ochs’ “Love Me, I’m A Liberal.” And don’t worry, this didn’t cut into book writing time — I wrote it in the shower.

comet_on_fridge
I jump to the top of the mantle
And then try to climb even higher,
I jump to the top of the stovetop
“Cuz cat hair won’t burn in a fire,
But it wasn’t me stealing your butter
Whoever said that is a liar,
So love me, love me, love me — I’m a kittycat!

Houdini staring
I hide in the springs of the sofa
And oftentimes under the bed,
That noise could have been a coyote,
Or demons, or Erik the Red,
But I think you’ve forgotten my dinner
So I’ll walk up and down on your head,
So love me, love me, love me — I’m a kittycat!

Talisker looking smug
I’ll plonk on your lap when I want to,
Demand that you sit there and stay,
I’ll act like I want to be petted
Then fidget and wander away,
But I have such cute whiskers and muzzle
So worship me all night and day,
And love me, love me, love me — I’m a kittycat!

Oh, for those of you who don’t know the original tune that this goes to: Here’s the original by Phil Ochs:

And here’s the updated version by Jello Biafra and Mojo Nixon:

But my kittycat one definitely has the deepest social commentary. Very relevant to the burning issues of today.

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So Love Me, Love Me, Love Me — I'm A Kittycat!

About the author

Greta Christina has been writing professionally since 1989, on topics including atheism, sexuality and sex-positivity, LGBT issues, politics, culture, and whatever crosses her mind. She is author of The Way of the Heathen: Practicing Atheism in Everyday Life, of Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing to Do with God, of Coming Out Atheist: How to Do It, How to Help Each Other, and Why, of Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, and of Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More, and is editor of Paying For It: A Guide by Sex Workers for Their Clients. She has been a public speaker for many years, and many of her talks can be seen on YouTube. Her writing has appeared in multiple magazines and newspapers, including Ms., Penthouse, Chicago Sun-Times, On Our Backs, and Skeptical Inquirer, and numerous anthologies, including Everything You Know About God Is Wrong and three volumes of Best American Erotica. (Any views she expresses in this blog are solely hers, and do not necessarily represent this organizations.) She lives in San Francisco with her wife, Ingrid. You can email her at gretachristina (at) gmail (dot) com, or follow her on Facebook.
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5 thoughts on “So Love Me, Love Me, Love Me — I'm A Kittycat!”

  3. Jackie Papercuts
    3

    Every time I sit at the desk I get visits from happy kitties.
    Then I get a Rottie head on my lap. If the rest of him fit, he’d hop up here too.
    They go where the laps are.
    We have to be very careful to shut the bathroom door until it latches because they think that’s a good place to find a captive audience too. It so isn’t. :/

  4. Anne D
    4

    Oh, wonderful, brava! A verse for each cat, too!

    I’m really enjoying the daily cat photos as well, they’re giving me something new to look forward to this month.

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