How to Write a Sex Scene Between a Unicorn and a Rainbow

The first thing you need to know is this: I wrote “The Unicorn and the Rainbow” on a dare. Which, given that this is the one story in my new erotica collection that everyone remembers and everyone talks about, is a weird beginning. But it’s a true story.

Here’s the story. I’m a regular reader at Perverts Put Out, a reading series of sex writers in the San Francisco Bay Area. A couple of years ago, I read a smutty fiction piece, which I prefaced with a warning to the audience. “This is kind of a disturbing story,” I said. “This story has elements of non-consent, borderline consent, some other stuff that some people may find disturbing.” And then I added, “But when do I ever come to Perverts Put Out with a smutty fiction piece and not say that? When do I ever come to Perverts Put Out with a fiction piece and say, ‘This is a really sweet story; this is a nice, gentle, happy story about unicorns fucking rainbows’?”

And at the break, about a dozen people came up to me and said that they dearly wanted me to write the story of the unicorn and the rainbow.

Challenge accepted!

I knew the story had to be disturbing. Dark. Noir, even. Oooo… noir. That could work. The first paragraph tumbled into my head:

Frank the unicorn walked into the bar. Midnight, pissing rain, and the grime on the neon-garish windows streaked down the glass like a whore’s mascara. The unicorn staggered across the floor and slammed his hoof on the bar. “Jack. Double shot.”

But after that, I was stumped for a bit. How do you write a sex scene between a mythical entity and an entity with no physical substance?


Bending cover
To read the rest of my essay on the writing of unicorn/ rainbow porn, go to How to Write a Sex Scene Between a Unicorn and a Rainbow — my guest post on io9, the celebrated online magazine about science, science fiction, and the future.

Here’s the deal: I’m doing a blog tour for my new erotic fiction collection, “Bending: Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, & More.” Today’s installment in the tour is a guest post I wrote for io9, detailing the creative process behind what is quickly becoming the most infamous story in the collection, The Unicorn and the Rainbow.

I’m going to say that one more time, since I’m so ridiculously proud of it: My guest post on io9. io9, people. So very proud! Yippee!

And remember — the book is currently available as an ebook on Kindle, Nook, and Smashwords. Audiobook and paperback are coming soon!

Previous stops on this blog tour:

Ozy Frantz’s Blog: Is Erotic Shame Real Shame? (guest post by me)
Ozy Frantz’s Blog: Christian Domestic Discipline (extended excerpt)

Ozy Frantz has taken down their blog. These posts have now been reprinted on my own blog:
Is Erotic Shame “Real” Shame? (essay)
Excerpt from Christian Domestic Discipline (extended excerpt)

Brute Reason: Greta Christina on Writing Dirty Stories (interview with Miri)

Lusty Lady, Rachel Kramer Bussell: Excerpt from Craig’s List (extended excerpt)

Charlie Glickman’s Blog: “Discover just how far sexy goes” (brief review/ blurb)

WWJTD? JT Eberhard: On Being an Atheist Writing Religious Porn, plus Excerpt from Penitence as a Perpetual Motion Machine (guest post by me, plus extended excerpt)

Passions and Provocations, Pam Rosenthal (a.k.a. Molly Weatherfield): How to Read a Remarkable Work of Erotica (review/ essay)

Curvacious Dee’s Blog: Bent Fiction, plus Excerpt from Doing It Over (review, plus extended excerpt)

Susie Bright’s Journal: Pain, Kink, Shame — and a Unicorn Chaser. Greta Christina’s New Erotic Epic! (brief review and extended excerpt from The Shame Photos

En Tequila Es Verdad, Dana Hunter’s blog: Why Is Kink Fun? (guest post by me)

Under His Hand, Kaya’s blog: Excerpt from This Week (extended excerpts)

Heina, Skepchick: Why Atheists Say “God” When They Have Sex (essay)

Girl on the Net: Someone else’s story (essay/review)

Trollop Salon, Alison Tyler’s interview blog: Greta Christina is in the Salon! (interview plus excerpt)

How to Write a Sex Scene Between a Unicorn and a Rainbow

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