Holy Shit, It's Been Too Long

I loves me my tequila (and rum, o’ course), but I haven’t been drinking it at home – I’ve been on a wine kick for years now, and save my hard drinking for when I’m out at the bars with friends. It seems like too much damned effort to mix something for me alone. I just didn’t realize precisely how long it’s been since I bought a bottle for home use until just now:

Should Washington get out of the booze business?

It’s been asked before, and might be again: Should we get rid of state-owned liquor stores?


You’ll find beer and wine in your local grocery stores, but only the state or businesses operating under contract with the state can sell hard liquor.

Nearly two years I’ve been here, and I had no fucking clue. It never even occurred to me to look. I guess all of that wonderful wine distracted me.

Holy Shit, It's Been Too Long

Bartenders: Dems Kick Republicon Ass

From the annals of totally useless but thoroughly entertaining news comes this recent study:

Partying Republicans in Washington will have to step it up after a recent survey of D.C.-area bartenders praised Democrats as being better tippers and talkers than their GOP counterparts.

The survey of 100 D.C.-area bartenders, conducted by Clarus Research Group for Beam Global Spirits & Wine, cast Democrats as more favorable bar patrons, as bartenders said they were better tippers, have better pick-up lines and were better at giving toasts.

Oh, hell yes. That’s my Dems. Better in every way, baby!

Snivelling Republicon spokesmen are casting aspersions on the survey, but the results are ironclad:

Brynna McCosker, the director of operations for Clarus, said the firm had tried to reduce sampling bias by surveying bartenders in parts of Washington seen as Republican strongholds, as well as Democratic hotspots.

Spin that, suckahs!

And lest you think this survey doesn’t reflect political realities, consider this bit o’ truthiness:

“Republicans seem to care little about America’s tomorrow,” quipped another Democratic staffer. “Between mixed drinks, body shots and pitchers of beer, Democrats seem to care little about their tomorrow morning.”

Truer words have never been spoken.

This survey is useful for another reason. Should I ever turn this virtual cantina into a brick, mortar and bottle one, I’ll know to charge Republicons a gratuity.

Drinks are free for Firedoglake denizens, who brought this very important survey to my attention, and available at a steep discount for Dems, who’ll make it up in the tips and the talk. And for you, my darlings, as always, drinks are on the house.


Bartenders: Dems Kick Republicon Ass

Drink Specials

This is a cantina. Alcohol should be involved (especially considering the subjects we discuss – alcohol is practically a necessity). Therefore, we’re going to start publishing some house specialties.

Where else would we start but with a margarita? And not just any margarita, mind you.

Dana’s Margarita Magnífico

José Cuervo Tradicional
Triple Sec
100% pure Key lime juice
Brown Sugar (seriously)

In step numero uno, combine your water, brown sugar, and Key lime juice to make lime aide. Sweeten to taste.

In step numero dos, stir in a goodly amount of Tradicional and just a smidgeon of Triple Sec.

Serve over ice. Proceed to oblivion.

You may ask, why brown sugar? I’ve made the lime aide with regular ol’ white sugar, and it’s all right. But the brown sugar – oh, honey, you’d be amazed at the difference! People who despise tequila and have never enjoyed margaritas suck these down like candy. I once spent a frantic evening doing nothing but mixing more margaritas because of all the buggers who’d assured me they never drink ’em, but they’d try a little taste… okay, a little more… may I have another pitcher, please?

So that’s House Specialty Numero Uno. I’m calling upon all of you to email me your delightful, unique, bizarre, or just plain devastating drink recipes so we can get a full bar going. I especially call upon Chaos Lee to share the secret of his Sambuca Shake. I have many happy memories of that shake, and so should you all.

Drink Specials