(Repost) “I Knew I Was Walking a Tightrope” – Escape Chapter 19: Resound of Music

Merril is rapidly gaining prestige in the FLDS community by delivering daughters for marriage to the prophet. Now that he’s traded three of them, he’s “one of the most exalted men in the community.” Let’s have a closer look at this exalted man, shall we?

Content Note: Emotional, verbal, and financial abuse.

Merril is an abusive shit, especially to his wives. Reading between the lines of what Carolyn says about him not being as predictable as her (also abusive) mother, we find he’s prone to blow up with very little or no warning. It’s taken Carolyn many years of monitoring his behavior closely to figure out when it’s time to get the hell away from him before he unloads. But she can’t just leave the room – she has to manufacture an excuse that won’t “make him suspicious.”  I assume from the context that means he’ll verbally assault her if he doesn’t find her reason for leaving his presence satisfactory. Continue reading “(Repost) “I Knew I Was Walking a Tightrope” – Escape Chapter 19: Resound of Music”

(Repost) “I Knew I Was Walking a Tightrope” – Escape Chapter 19: Resound of Music
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(Repost) “A Radical Departure” – Escape Chapter 19: Resound of Music

There are only a few situations in which having coffee with your friends is a revolutionary act. Being in the FLDS is one of them. And it’s something you may not even be able to contemplate until your sister is forced into marriage with another man.

Content note for forced marriage, spiritual abuse, and financial coercion.

It’s been a long time since we’ve seen Carolyn’s sister Linda. She and her husband have fallen on hard times and, with no other options, moved back to Short Creek. The sisters’ father offers to help her financially, but only if she divorces her husband (who’s on the wrong side of the FLDS schism) and allows herself and her child to be assigned to another man. Pregnant and out of options, she agrees. Continue reading “(Repost) “A Radical Departure” – Escape Chapter 19: Resound of Music”

(Repost) “A Radical Departure” – Escape Chapter 19: Resound of Music

(Repost) “Another Body Added to the Scrap Heap” – Escape Chapter 18: Tammy’s Failed Rebellion

Merril just keeps getting worse. We’re about to see how he punishes rebellion in a wife, and I have to warn you, although there’s no physical violence, his verbal and emotional abuse is utterly horrible. There’s also medical neglect of a newborn. If you don’t have an abundance of spoons right now, you may want to wait until you do. And get everything out of reach that you don’t want to break, because you may be throwing things and screaming before this is over.

Content note: emotional and verbal abuse, medical neglect, childbirth, birth complications, infant illness, adult sexual abuse and manipulation

After six years of trying, Tammy finally gets pregnant. She is rather subdued about it at first, but when the time comes to deliver, she wants it to be a huge event. She invites all of her current sister wives, and all of her ex-sister wives from her marriage to Uncle Roy. Not everyone can make it – Carolyn’s so sick with her fourth pregnancy that she misses the birth, but a dozen or more people show up.

Now, remember that the women in the FLDS don’t give birth in hospitals, but in the little community clinic with a midwife. And they’re not prepared for the big emergencies. Unfortunately, Tammy’s baby gets stuck in the birth canal. And the only way the clinic has to deal with such an emergency is to move Tammy into various positions to try to free him. Continue reading “(Repost) “Another Body Added to the Scrap Heap” – Escape Chapter 18: Tammy’s Failed Rebellion”

(Repost) “Another Body Added to the Scrap Heap” – Escape Chapter 18: Tammy’s Failed Rebellion

(Repost) “The List of Ugly Realities” – Escape Chapter 17: Marrying into the Jeffs’ Family

This is a short chapter, but it gives us quite a bit of insight into Merril’s thirst for power, Warren Jeffs’ creepy early years, and FLDS hypocrisy and dysfunction.

Content note for forced marriage, child abuse, and spousal abuse.

Merril wants more power and prestige within the FLDS, and of course, the way to get it is by bartering your young daughters into sexual slavery. He’s already forced one to marry ancient prophet Rulon Jeffs. Now he sacrifices pretty Paula. As she’s married off to a man 60 years her senior, “Her still smile barely [hides] her despair.” All Carolyn can think about is how she and Paula had joked in school about “having to marry an old man who was a rest-home patient.” This is Paula’s nightmare: her new husband is so old and weak he has to sit throughout the ceremony. It’s one thing to marry someone older for love: it’s quite another to be sold off, with no choice in the matter, and no chance he’ll give you the children who are your only worth in your society. Continue reading “(Repost) “The List of Ugly Realities” – Escape Chapter 17: Marrying into the Jeffs’ Family”

(Repost) “The List of Ugly Realities” – Escape Chapter 17: Marrying into the Jeffs’ Family

(Repost) “I Won’t Let You Deny Me My Dignity” – Escape Chapter 16: Giving Birth in the FLDS

So, you know how the FLDS takes ordinary things and turns them into something horrible? Then you won’t be surprised at all to see them do it with childbirth.

Content note for emetophobia, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, child abuse, coercion, sexual coercion, gaslighting, and victim blaming.

Carolyn is seven months pregnant, and has to regularly dash from her second grade classroom to vomit due to morning sickness. But she loves teaching and doesn’t want to leave her students. They and her own children are the only people who make her life worthwhile.

But her children are a vulnerability as well as a delight. The other wives find excuses to chastise and punish her young son in order to provoke and attack Carolyn by proxy. Continue reading “(Repost) “I Won’t Let You Deny Me My Dignity” – Escape Chapter 16: Giving Birth in the FLDS”

(Repost) “I Won’t Let You Deny Me My Dignity” – Escape Chapter 16: Giving Birth in the FLDS