Coinky-dinks are funny things. I didn’t think I’d ever come across glittery hoo-ha’s again outside of the Dogs and Goddesses deconstruction I’d got inadvertently sucked in to at Raven Wings. For those who are blissfully unaware of it, Dogs and Goddesses is a gawdawful romance book about a bunch of single women, their dogs, and some Mesopotamian goddess, plus a sexy god (of course), and a weird murderous priestess (ditto), and the sexy but assholish math professor (yep), and some other people I don’t even remember, because the bits Yami quoted were atrocious. There is a potion, and aphrodisiac cookies, and one of the ladies ends up with endless orgasm powers, and I just can’t with this.
Look, I only got involved in it because I was reading her This Present Darkness deconstruction. I will tell you about that book someday soon. Then you will understand why I enjoyed watching Yami savage it, and why I accidentally ended up reading a deconstruction of a really bizarre romance novel. Yami’s really damned good at deconstructions and I was powerless, okay?
Anyway. Goddesses. Dogs. And, toward the end the book, glittery hoo-ha’s.And I was like,
And I was relieved when the book ended, figuring that would be the last of the glittery hoo-has’s, and I’d never have to deal with this ever again, but the universe was all like,
Some guy named William Lehman has written an essay, Destroy the myth, destroy the culture, that starts off with a reasonable premise and then goes totally off the rails, in an entertainingly oblivious way, and as it’s crashing, invents a new label: the “SJW Glittery hoo ha crowd”. I love it, even though I don’t have a hoo ha, glittery or otherwise. I’m still happy to be associated with glittery hoo has fighting for social justice.
I have a hoo-ha. It does not glitter. I don’t plan to vajazzle it, either. Ever. Okay, maybe when I’m an extremely old woman and I’m all like, “Fuck it! I do what I want, and what I want to do today is make my vagina sparkle!” At that point, it won’t matter if there’s a terrible mishap and it ends up damaged, because I won’t have to live with the results for decades. Until then, although I like glittery things, I will not be making my lady parts glitter.
However. Comma. I, too, will be happy to be associated with Glittery Hoo-Ha’s for Social Justice. And I may even go so far as to glitter my navel in solidarity.
Do you think that’ll be glittery enough for now?
I don’t suppose the ‘glittery’ is an erroneously used synonym for ‘glistening’, is it…?
But heck, I’d much rather be a glittery hoo-ha (esp. the SJW variety) than have one. Glittery navels for the win!
Glittery navels are attractive, glittery hoo-has would, IMHO, not be as nice. Besides, some glitter could be irritating if placed on mucus membranes.
I read that book. It was so horrible that it was actually rather entertaining.
If you want a REALLY bad and NOT entertaining book… A Woman Worth Ten Coppers. You KNOW the book is going to be bad when the main characters tells you that she’s the Chosen One just a couple pages in.
Simplify: can’t you just get William Lehman to review Dogs and Goddesses for you? He obviously knows the subject matter at first hand…
The glitter naval could work nicely for covert glitter-bomb attacks! For decorating orifices, not so much.
How long has the Goddess thing been a thing? It seems like Goddess stuff is everywhere all-of-a-sudden. My wife went to a Bday party with a bunch of the girls and apparently the party featured a Goddess Ceremony (which she thankfully wasn’t able to stick around for.)
“Some”? I’m going to go with “all”… ;)