Mohs Nokia

I’ve owned two Nokia phones so far. The first one I dropped on a concrete parking garage floor. It split into two pieces, and I was all, “Oshit, I’ll have to buy a new phone!” But I picked up the bits and snapped them back together, and that phone is still in service six years later. Cujo has it now.

My second Nokia phone took a dive from a second-story balcony onto the concrete patio below when I was visiting Evelyn in New Hampshire. She offered me sympathy, because second story and concrete. I just laughed, skipped downstairs, grabbed the phone, snapped the casing back in place, and turned it on. It’s the phone I’m still using today. Well, until I break down and get a smartphone.

Speaking of smartphones, did you know that if you need a hammer but haven’t got one, you can use a Nokia Lumia instead? Not that you necessarily should, but chances are, it would do the job and survive.*


So that’s Nokias: you can destroy them, but you have to try harder. They make a fabulous addition to the Mohs hardness scale:

mohs nokia
Fuck yeah, Nokia! Now please come out with an Android smartphone so I can have everything I want in this world.


*Despite Nokia’s legendary toughness, do not pound on it with a sledgehammer. It will be extremely unhappy with you, and Nokia will laugh when you try to replace it under warranty.

Mohs Nokia

8 thoughts on “Mohs Nokia

  1. 1

    That is my kind of phone. I’ll look into one next time I have the option to switch. I am notoriously tough on equipment and have worn out two Leatherman tools. Both were replaced for free by the manufacturer — they even threw in a replacement belt pouch. *end shameless plug*

  2. 2

    Don’t you WORK for a wireless company? (Verizon, I think?) Can’t you get some sort of awesome employee discount?

    My wife and I have had the Droid Razr Maxx (silly name, great phone) for about a year. Mine kept me sane when I was laid up in the hospital and nursing home. But I’m not about to try using it as a hammer.

  3. rq

    That’s the kind of phone I need. I mean, I try to keep it away from the kids, but… intelligent apes and all that, plus some stuff about curiosity. :)

  4. 5

    Yes, even though a diamond is a “10” you don’t use it to pry open paint cans unless absolutely necessary.

    I had a very good experience with a motorola razor. My daughter lost it in a snow bank at the bus stop (apparently) in December and it came out with the dog poo and other stuff on National Point Out Dog Poo day in April, found by a person who called me from it (the battery was still good) so I could make arrangements to pick it up. that’s not physical toughness (assuming it was never run over by a bus or snow plow) but environmental toughness.

  5. 6

    I own a Casio stupidphone from Verizon, advertised for its toughness (I tend to drop my phone a lot). I like the way you can positively turn off the outside control buttons with a slider, since I carry it in my pocket and lots of weird things happened to my previous phone from being carried in my pocket, even though I had it set to “lock” those controls. This phone’s battery lasts a lot longer, too, and I suspect that it’s just because, being locked, it’s insensitive to accidental button pushes. I haven’t considered getting a smartphone, because all I do with it is make phone calls! Yes, people still use phones for that. :)

  6. 7

    I haven’t considered getting a smartphone, because all I do with it is make phone calls! Yes, people still use phones for that. :)

    Someone after my own heart.

    My stupidphone cost me $1.50 at a yard sale – I don’t know who made it, it just says Verizon. It’s constantly beeping and sometimes taking pictures as it travels in my pocket. I don’t know how to turn off the outside control buttons, since I don’t have the manual. I suppose if I cared enough I could figure it out or look it up online.

    The folks at the Verizon store transferred my contacts from my older and dying stupidphone, and activated it. The guy also looked at the number of minutes I use and signed me up for the senior rate, even though I’m not actually quite old enough to qualify.

    I also used dial-up internet until it became just painfully slow due to larger and larger website content. I viewed the inability to receive phone calls while I was online as a feature, rather than a bug.

    All of that said, and lest I be viewed as a complete Luddite, I (mostly) love the internet. You can find out almost anything, and some of it is true! ;-)

  7. 8

    “I (mostly) love the internet. You can find out almost anything, and some of it is true! ;-)”

    Love the comment.

    We switched to DSL early on, since Husband is a DSL engineer. We’ve had a variety of DSL modems in our household, some of which weren’t ready for prime time… but mostly, all has been well. I’ve used Wikipedia more times than I can count to look up some fact for my thesis that I couldn’t quite remember, and the book was at school, and I was at home. I also get my news online, primarily through Yahoo’s news aggregator. We cancelled the newspaper a year or so ago.

    My cousin, who’s out in a very rural area, can only get dialup or satellite. So far he’s refused to pay the premium for satellite, and I keep telling him he doesn’t know what he’s missing.

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