Winter Car Wash

Brianne Bilyeu, ,

Those of you who drive in the winter know the frustration of dirty cars.  The salt, sand and slush that splashes up on the car is bad enough, but it’s not the only indignity.  There’s the constant spraying of windshield washer fluid, which cleans barely enough of the windshield to see through for about 30 seconds – unless you have ice on your wipers, and then it won’t even clean that well. And I dare you to try to walk through a Minnesota parking lot in the middle of January without smearing white-gray dusty dirt on your coat.

The temptation to take the car through a car wash is great. It becomes an obsession – the huge icicles that have built up in the wheel wells (WWIs aka boogers) and behind the tires grow longer each day. And like the crusty salt coating the undercarriage, the dirtiness of the car slowly eats away on you.

And then something crazy happens – the sun comes out and the temperature inches toward 10F. The sun!  It’s noon, the sun is at its zenith, the temperature is relatively balmy and you think…maybe, just maybe I could go through the car wash today.  The sun’s out, it’s less cold than usual…maybe the doors and windows won’t freeze shut afterwards. I could get the salt off of the car, and I’ll have the cleanest car in the state! Mwahahaha!

But this is why you don’t give in temptation: Two miles post-car wash:

The slush, man. The slush will getcha every time. 

But for a brief moment, my car was shiney.  It was brilliant.  It was the cleanest car on the roads that day.  For about 2 minutes.

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Winter Car Wash

About the author

Thoughts from a Minneapolis-based nerdy, liberal, humanist progressive on topics such as science, skepticism, religion, atheism, critical thought, politics, and local and global humanitarian and equality efforts. Biodork <3's geek culture, groan-inducing puns, world travel, cultural exchange and sharing and listening to stories.
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