Dating Websites

I find dating websites fascinating.  I tend to join them out of shear curiosity.  I’ve had profiles on pretty much every dating site you can think of.  Mostly to see how creepy they were and what the quality of matching is.

There was one that I didn’t get to be on, because it judged whether you were hot enough to join and, because I joined at I guess a slow part of the week, I didn’t get enough votes to be judged effectively.  I left PlentyofFish because of the extreme creepiness of all of the members who contacted me.  I still have an OKCupid profile and it’s ridiculously filled out because I needed to get 100% completion.  Goals people.  I don’t mind OKCupid, though I get a fair amount of creepsters, partially because there’s lots of neat data that they analyze for you.  Their blog is awesome.

And then there’s the mainstream ones., eharmony, J-date (which seems to have a ton of not Jewish people who aren’t willing to convert, I guess looking for Jewish people anyway?), are all major yawners.  I suppose the fact that I’m not willing to pay for online dating negatively impacts my experience on these sites, but even when they have things like “free weekends”, I’m not very impressed with what I see.

And then there’s the little specialty sites who have so few users that there’s no point in joining if you don’t live in New York.  I even joined one where people would have to pay to go on a date with me (what an awesome idea!), but there’s like 10 people in a 100 mile radius who aren’t super Christian.  Though that may just be a demographic fact, not a fault of the site.

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Dating Websites

5 random things I’ve been thinking about

1. Toilet seat sheets.  If you’re too grossed out to sit on the toilet, is a sheet really going to make it better?

The show I’m working on, these two women who were otherwise not like high maintenance said they would never use a toilet that wasn’t their own without a toilet sheet.  What?  Seriously?  Was I raised by weirdos because they never said don’t put your butt on the toilet?

2. Ableism and online dating.  Particularly in the mental health department, but also in general.

Now I appreciate that online dating attracts a somewhat skewed group that has the semi-anonymity of the internet to make unusual demands, but I have seen so so many guys profiles where they say they don’t want to date “anyone who’s ever been on anti-depressants” or “I don’t want to date anyone who has had any health problems”.  These are not necessarily guys who, in my opinion, have girls knocking down their door and they’re just trying to filter out some people by being picky.  And I realize we’ve all got things where we aren’t able to have a nuanced viewpoint, but here are guys lumping in people with asthma with people with cancer, or people with well-treated depression with untreated schizophrenics.  I get how taking on a significant other with terminal cancer or an untreated illness might be difficult, but are we going to scratch out every one with a health quirk?

At first I thought, oh it’s just this one guy who had a bad experience, but I’ve seen it so many times I just don’t know what to think.  Is it really that awful to date someone who at some point in their life was depressed or has some other chronic illness that’s well under control?

3. Also related to online dating, why do guys who are super Christian message me advertising their good Christian morals when I state that I am an atheist?  I mean, I know why, they don’t read, but I mean really.

4. Equating religion with race.  There’s a super long thread over at Pharyngula where people are accusing PZ of being a Nazi for posting a picture that a cartoonist drew of Muhammed because there are people in Europe who are racist against Muslim immigrants.  I’m just not sure “racist” is the right word.  “Religionist” maybe?  Anyway, critiquing a religion isn’t a violent act, no matter how crudely done, and I don’t understand how blasphemy is racist.

5. How difficult or impossible it is for the religious to understand that there is value and meaning to life regardless of whether there is an afterlife.

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5 random things I’ve been thinking about