Apocalypse When
Apocalypse of the Week 12: Thrust In Thy Sharp Sickle
Tribulation. The Rapture. The Second Coming. For many, these terms are synonymous with the end of the world. Indeed, the terms “apocalypse” and “Armageddon” both entered the public consciousness because of their appearances in the Bible, and have since become synonymous with the more general term “eschaton.” But what’s actually involved in the Christian vision of the end of the world? One could be forgiven for forgetting that the original story bears little resemblance to the modern-day, politics-themed reimagining lampooned in a previous installment. Rather, here be dragons. And enough gruesome torture to make Mortal Kombat cutscenes feel like Sesame Street.
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Apocalypse of the Week 11: This Magic Skull Goes All the Way to…Zero
The giant earth crocodile with mouths at all of her joints.
Giant ape-men with backward feet and hanging intestines that waylay travelers.
The plumed serpent of the sun, wind, and mercy, who raped his human-shaped sister while divinely hammered and still got to keep the “mercy” portfolio, and is also the planet Venus for some reason.
Feeding the sun with the beating hearts of thousands of sacrifices.
And you thought Revelation was sick.
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Apocalypse of the Week 10: Unspecified Event at Unknown Time with Voluptuous Edith
One to be born with two teeth in his mouth
They will die of famine the trees stripped,
For them a new King issues a new edict.
Plague and new affront, to tourble the enclosure:
The fury will bite in Aix and the places thereabout,
Then those of Marseilles will want to double their evil.
Apocalypse of the Week 9: Romania Will Rise Again
Apocalypse of the Week 8: Your Mother Smelt of Subroutines
Those of us born in the 1980s came of age in an interesting time, as the Communist governments of eastern and central Europe fell, one country turned into 15 and somehow stayed the largest in the world, and computers learned how to handle four-digit years.
And you’d better believe it was a big deal.
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Apocalypse of the Week 7: Wolves and Snakes and Eyjafjallajökull, Oh My!
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Apocalypse of the Week 6: The Surf Shop at the End of the World
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Apocalypse of the Week 5: Death by Comet Farts
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Apocalypse of the Week 4: Hot, Sticky Justice
Veterans of the atheosphere might recognize Zoroastrianism as the ancient Persian religion whose Mithraic component is the best-attested antecedent for many Christian traditions, such as celebrating the birth of Jesus on 25 December. What I didn’t know is that Zoroastrianism is a living religion, with active fire temples singing the praises of the god Ahura Mazda and a world membership of over 200,000, a surprising fraction of which live in Canada. I can only imagine how they feel about freethinkers using their history as one of many disproofs of Christianity. My guess? Weirdly flattered.
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