Yonggary (or Reptile 2001 or The Reptilian) is not Godzilla, thank you very much. The monster is resurrected by aliens instead of being created by radiation, for one thing. Also…um…eh, it looks both worse and more fun to watch. We don’t really need more of an excuse than that.
I freely admit at the outset that the only reason we’re watching The Secrets of Emily Blair this month is that every picture I can find of Emily looking horribly, inhumanly, grossly possessed still features her in killer eye makeup. Really, that’s it. Well, I mean, it also looks terrible.
[Warning for strobe cuts at the end of this trailer.]
This one is available on Netflix. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: Stylish Possession Edition”
Feeling sad you missed May’s mocking? You didn’t actually. We had to cancel at the last minute. Watch with us this month instead.
We were feeling in need of one of those great Fifties and Sixties exploitation movies that ends up exploiting little more than its actors because it’s so confused about its subject. In this case, the subject is Satanism. Or paganism. Or voodoo. Or…oh, I don’t know. Come watch The Devil’s Hand with us and find out.
I’ve missed watching terrible religious movies. Not enough to watch them on my own without mocking them, mind you, but still. So this month, we’re doing the hair metal of biblical epics. That’s right. It’s Samson.
This one is on Netflix. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: Luscious Locks Edition”
This one is available on YouTube. You’ll notice the timing is unusual. We’re watching this tomorrow (Wednesday) at 9 p.m. Eastern. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: Blonde Bombshell Edition”
This month, we’re watching a Zelazny movie! Well, we’re watching a movie based on a Roger Zelazny book. Okay, we’re watching a movie with the same title as a Roger Zelazny book. All right, fine. We’re watching Damnation Alley because it’s late-70s George Peppard and Jan-Michael Vincent and Paul Winfield for however long his character survives.
This one is available on YouTube. The actual movie starts at 2:08. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: What Book? Edition”
As it turns out, a movie doesn’t have to be good to be treated like a classic. It can be “not as awful as I expected” or “long-awaited” or simply “not the worst video game movie out there”. That’s right. We’re watching Doom this month, because at the least the leads are entertaining.
This one is available on Netflix. Be warned that the first-person CGI sequence toward the end of the film has been known to cause motion sickness in those who are susceptible. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: Like a Classic Edition”
What’s better than a movie full of Eighties hair and music? A plot, decent acting, and good fight choreography, you say? Pish-tosh! You act like you’re looking for quality movies. Arena is not a quality movie.
This one is available on YouTube. Watch with us tonight. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: New Wave Edition”
You could watch a movie where questions about consciousness and death are used to make us think about what it means to be human or to question the nature of existence itself. Or you could watch The Lazarus Effect and pretend that we know less about the brain than we do in order to scare people. For some reason, we’ve decided to do the latter.
[Warning: Strobe in the trailer.]
This one is available on Netflix. Watch with us this Tuesday. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: Bad Brains Edition”
Once upon a time, in the beforetimes, when The Asylum made movies that weren’t supposed to be so bad they were funny, when they operated as Faith Films and made cheap Christian ripoffs of blockbusters, Jason and I sat down to watch a bad movie in Nova Scotia. He tweeted both our reactions to the movie. People wanted to know what we were watching that was so terrible. They wanted to be part of the awful, and Mock the Movie was born.
This month, we’re going to watch a very bad YouTube video of this very bad movie to revisit our roots. Won’t you join us in watching 2012 Doomsday? You’ll hate it. We promise.
This one is available on YouTube. Please note that we’re changing the date of Mock the Movie to accommodate our schedules. We’ll be watching on first Tuesdays after this month. We weren’t quick enough to grab the first Tuesday this month, so we’re mocking this Tuesday instead. Continue reading “Mock the Movie: Where It All Began Edition”