So here we have a guy who says religion is a crock
It’s hateful and belligerent – but Jesus is his rock!
Now what’s the difference, you might ask, that sets apart his creed?
Religion’s just hypocrisy, self-righteousness and greed
To follow Jesus means you simply give yourself to God,
Who died for all our sins and stuff – now doesn’t this sound odd?

He loves his Bible, church, and Lord, he still believes in sin
But nope, that’s not religion, for the difference lies within
He doesn’t think he’s perfect – oh yes, what a humble soul
He’s not a fan of rules, just believing is his role
So don’t be sanctimonious, admit that you’re a sinner,
Believe that Jesus died for you, and God says you’re a winner!

I’ve never heard of that before, dear Jefferson Bethke
But it sure sounds familiar – oh! It’s Christianity!
Now who on earth would fall for this cute definition trick?
If you don’t think about it, then it does seem rather slick.

Religion’s often seen as being hate-filled and judgmental
To have that name hitched to your faith would be so detrimental
So let’s just find another word – let’s call the whole thing “Jesus”
And maybe it might actually change how the world sees us.

Yes, I see what you did there, Jeff, but nobody’s impressed
When one religious movement claims that only they are blessed
It’s nothing new when churches paint all others as a blight,
As sheer demonic heresy – for they alone are right
From doctrine, dogma, sin and Hell, you give us no relief
It’s just a crafty strategy to market your belief.

So who is Mr. Bethke, and from what was he inspired?
He says it’s just a home-made film. Is that how this transpired?
We know that he’s a member of a church that’s called Mars Hill
Where thousands gather every week to hear the holy spiel.

Mark Driscoll is their pastor, a self-styled rebel cleric
Whose stances, theologically, are really quite generic
This macho, hardcore preacher never hesitates to tell:
If you haven’t heard of Jesus, then prepare to burn in Hell!
To him there’s no salvation in benevolent behavior
Being nice won’t help you – you need Jesus as your savior.

And no doubt Pastor Driscoll thinks himself rather volcanic,
When he tells his parishioners that yoga is Satanic
On women in the clergy, we’re assured that he’s no advocate
If they can’t bring in manly men, that means they’re inadequate.

Instructing people on how they should live their married life,
He tells a tale of how he wished to leave his pregnant wife
What would prompt a Godly man to make this declaration?
He found out that in high school, she had sexual relations
And when he goes on Facebook to mock “effeminate” preachers,
There’s little to distinguish him from other Christian teachers.

While Bethke aims to make his faith seem so much more dimensional,
We all know that it’s nothing but religion most conventional
And I don’t think you need so many platitudes to say,
“Religion’s old and stuffy – now let’s go to church and pray!”

Word.