Mock The Movie: Killer Condom transcript

I didn’t get to join in on this Troma film last Wednesday, sadly. However, it seems like the participants were actually pretty content with the movie as-is, as the mocking was pretty thin.

Which I simply can’t get my head around, given that it’s a Troma movie about condoms that murder people.

Seriously.

CA7746 provides the subtitle file, which I’ll likely use later tonight to watch it myself. He’s also still digging through our archives and has done a subtitle file for Maniac in white-text only, and in color. I’m going to put together a Mock The Movie page as soon as I scrape together the time to do so, to hold links to all our previous mockings and transcripts.

Here’s our calendar of upcoming events. You can also subscribe to the iCal file.


@szvan: Mock the Movie: Evil Prophylaxis Edition: http://t.co/RatcPh7u Oh, hey. This is tonight. @MockTM
2013-02-13 17:28:49
@szvan: @MockTM Tell me I’m not the only one watching tonight.
2013-02-14 01:59:56
@szvan: @MockTM At least they got Matt Groening to do the lettering on the credits. How bad can it be? #famouslastwords
2013-02-14 02:01:29
@CA7746: @MockTM Redroom. Redroom.
2013-02-14 02:02:20
@CarlieP: @szvan @MockTM I can start watching again once Top Chef is over. 🙂
2013-02-14 02:02:32
@szvan: @MockTM Okay, we can kill him now.
2013-02-14 02:03:11
@CA7746: @MockTM The title’s singular. Same one used again and again? Ew.
2013-02-14 02:04:45
@szvan: @MockTM That was the most satisfying fake blood I’ve ever seen.
2013-02-14 02:04:52
@CA7746: @MockTM New York? We must be in Little Germany.
2013-02-14 02:05:07
@szvan: @MockTM Um, dude. Maybe you should take those sunglasses off. You’re not Corey Hart.
2013-02-14 02:06:20
@szvan: @MockTM Ah, yes. This is how the Germans saw Oklahoma. I’m not sure they were wrong…except for the German.
2013-02-14 02:08:02
@szvan: @MockTM What is it people like about New York? The way everyone speaks German, of course.
2013-02-14 02:10:03
@CA7746: @MockTM At least the walls were already red.
2013-02-14 02:12:02
@szvan: @MockTM Actually, I think parts of his clientele would pay more for the room bathed in blood.
2013-02-14 02:12:37
@leilah: @MockTM Somehow, it being in German is making it more bearable. I can’t figure out why…
2013-02-14 02:15:37
@leilah: @MockTM I knew one day my lack of metric knowledge would come back to haunt me…
2013-02-14 02:18:56
@szvan: @MockTM Aww. Poor little rejected condom.
2013-02-14 02:19:09
@szvan: @MockTM @leilah Almost 13″.
2013-02-14 02:19:40
@szvan: @MockTM Wait. He was completely naked.
2013-02-14 02:21:07
@leilah: @mocktm Bed bug, maybe?
2013-02-14 02:24:28
@szvan: @MockTM Really, how can someone mock a movie with a noir monologue about the downside of having a huge penis?
2013-02-14 02:27:46
@leilah: @szvan @MockTM That was AWESOME.
2013-02-14 02:28:44
@szvan: @MockTM What? The hotel doors are locked?!
2013-02-14 02:32:57
@leilah: @MockTM Does Babette remind anyone else of Mark Gatiss? Something about the voice, I mean…
2013-02-14 02:34:37
@leilah: @mocktm Coffee? You sick bastard!
2013-02-14 02:38:45
@szvan: @MockTM NO! NOT THE CIGARETTE!!!
2013-02-14 02:39:38
@szvan: @MockTM How was this camera operator not nominated for an Oscar for that tracking shot?
2013-02-14 02:41:09
@szvan: @MockTM In what other movie can you get a lecture about the science of living condoms?
2013-02-14 02:46:40
@leilah: @MockTM It’s those damned geneticists! I KNEW it!
2013-02-14 02:47:08
@leilah: @MockTM TOLERATE ME!
2013-02-14 02:48:07
@szvan: @MockTM Oh, noes! Invasion of the killer condoms!
2013-02-14 02:50:09
@CA7746: @MockTM The US would never elect someone like that. He speaks German.
2013-02-14 02:52:44
@leilah: @MockTM Wait. He got completely done up in one costume in order to change into another?
2013-02-14 02:56:55
@leilah: @MockTM Ok, this is… I’m really loving this movie.
2013-02-14 03:00:32
@szvan: @MockTM @leilah Seriously. This is quickly becoming my favorite terrible, awful film ever.
2013-02-14 03:05:01
@CA7746: @MockTM Oh, I get it. This is a metaphor. For Rent.
2013-02-14 03:06:52
@szvan: @MockTM But what about the boys who just want to have fun?!
2013-02-14 03:15:22
@szvan: @MockTM Way to sneak up on them, detective. Good thing you’re a pro.
2013-02-14 03:23:48
@szvan: @MockTM Someone should introduce Doc here to the pathologist. I think they’d get along.
2013-02-14 03:26:29
@leilah: @MockTM Oh noes! They got R2-D2!
2013-02-14 03:30:41
@leilah: @MockTM @szvan Not much mocking tonight, but I can’t thank you enough for picking this movie. That was sweet. =)
2013-02-14 03:43:47
@CA7746: @MockTM *Lightswitch rave*
2013-02-14 03:44:44
@CA7746: @MockTM Can’t anyone here translate what this woman is saying?
2013-02-14 03:45:05
@szvan: @MockTM @CA7746 She’s predicting the rise of Gaga in a decade plus.
2013-02-14 03:46:05

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Mock The Movie: Killer Condom transcript
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