Mock The Movie: Rocketship X-M transcript

If simply watching the movie and mocking it yourself wasn’t enough, and if you happened to miss this Twitter event, please enjoy the following transcript of five nerds thoroughly eviscerating this Lloyd Bridges “masterpiece”.

@lousycanuck: @MockTM Aaand… pressing play… now. No, Now. NOW. I mean NOW. GAH! GO!
2011-09-23 01:00:46
@lousycanuck: If you want to join in, go here, hit play, follow @MockTM and tweet your mockery to it.
2011-09-23 01:02:00
@szvan: @MockTM Wait. Mars will be black and white? What fun is that?
2011-09-23 01:02:04
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Nothing to be alarmed about – that morpheine injection didn’t do anything to your blood pressure.
2011-09-23 01:03:03
@DrRubidium: @szvan @MockTM black is very slimming and I look good in white, so that’s ok 😀
2011-09-23 01:03:06
@DrRubidium: @mockTM “not strictly a military project” = totally, 100% a military project
2011-09-23 01:04:02
@lousycanuck: @MockTM What happened to T? Was it holding out for a bigger salary? Why are we talking about X minus 16 minutes?
2011-09-23 01:04:03
@szvan: @MockTM “Ladies and gentlemen…well, okay. You’re gentlemen.”
2011-09-23 01:04:18
@DrRubidium: @mockTM who is that lady staring off into space? is she pissed she’s not going to space?
2011-09-23 01:05:21
@szvan: @MockTM We sending people into space, and you didn’t know anything about it until tonight. Uh, huh.
2011-09-23 01:05:29
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Shorter this guy: “Don’t worry about those aliens. Only talk about the approved non-alien stuff.”
2011-09-23 01:05:32
@DrRubidium: @mockTM LADY CHEMIST! Ok, this movie is awesome
2011-09-23 01:05:47
@lousycanuck: @MockTM An unassailable base on the moon to CONTROL WORLD PEACE. This had better involve holographic cons about the rapture.
2011-09-23 01:06:10
@szvan: @MockTM “Mr. Chamberlain will serve as official chin on this flight.”
2011-09-23 01:06:31
@DrRubidium: @MockTM you’re sending people to fucking Mars and you’re explaining that via chalk talk?!
2011-09-23 01:07:21
@lousycanuck: @MockTM SLINGSHOT AROUND THE WORLD! Don’t go the wrong way though, or you’ll accidentally turn time backward.
2011-09-23 01:08:06
@szvan: @MockTM “And when we get to the moon, we will carefully parallel park.”
2011-09-23 01:08:34
@lousycanuck: @MockTM More than twice the fuel we use to get to the moon, and we’re going to make it all the way to fucking Mars. It’s a Hybrid rocket.
2011-09-23 01:08:58
@szvan: @MockTM “Do you have any family?” “Oh, no. Only my chin.”
2011-09-23 01:09:05
@DrRubidium: @MockTM monoatomic hydrogen is the magic behind getting to Mars?! DAMN
2011-09-23 01:09:08
@szvan: @MockTM “When a Texas man makes up his mind to do something, we have instant comic relief!”
2011-09-23 01:09:48
@lousycanuck: @MockTM When a Texas man makes up his mind to go to the moon, and his wife says no, BANG ZOOM.
2011-09-23 01:10:03
@szvan: @MockTM Oh, no. She’s not a woman. She’s a scientist!
2011-09-23 01:10:39
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Is there any reason a member of the crew should be a woman?” Man: “I’d like to answer that. No.”
2011-09-23 01:10:53
@DrRubidium: @MockTM turns out you don’t need space suits to travel to Mars. You only need safari oufits & combat boots.
2011-09-23 01:11:13
@szvan: RT @lousycanuck: @MockTM “Is there any reason a member of the crew should be a woman?” Man: “I’d like to answer that. No.”
2011-09-23 01:11:15
@blakestacey: Gah. Missed the beginning of @MockTM.
2011-09-23 01:11:26
@lousycanuck: @MockTM I’ve checked these calculations many times, they’re correct. Pi is definitely 3.12, right?
2011-09-23 01:11:46
@lousycanuck: @MockTM They’re going to pilot a gigantic vibrator — no, Hugo award — into space. SCIENCE!!!!
2011-09-23 01:12:50
@lousycanuck: @MockTM We won’t be this close to Mother Earth in some time. Get a good long look. Kiss its neck. Grab its ass a little. Just a little.
2011-09-23 01:13:39
@DrRubidium: @MockTM are we sure they’re not in a submarine?
2011-09-23 01:13:47
@blakestacey: @MockTM joining late. Gonna assume the first 12:30 of the movie wasn’t particularly important.
2011-09-23 01:13:52
@blakestacey: @MockTM “X minus 4 minutes”? Did someone miss the alphabet lesson in Space Academy?
2011-09-23 01:14:38
@DrRubidium: @MockTM General Electric? They’re in the space equipment biz?
2011-09-23 01:15:15
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Everyone strap into your cryogenic hammocks!
2011-09-23 01:15:20
@blakestacey: @MockTM Bunk beds — of the future!
2011-09-23 01:15:31
@szvan: The entertainment sponsorship business, actually. RT @DrRubidium: @MockTM General Electric? They’re in the space equipment biz?
2011-09-23 01:15:45
@lousycanuck: @MockTM This failed trip to the moon brought to you by General Electric
2011-09-23 01:16:04
@DrRubidium: @MockTM what the hell is that look on their faces at lift-off?! #NSFW
2011-09-23 01:16:15
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Looks like EVERYONE’s “blasting off” here, hur hur hur
2011-09-23 01:16:36
@szvan: @MockTM Oops. That nose cone is crooked. That’s gonna be awkward.
2011-09-23 01:16:37
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Booster?” “Go, flight.” “Retro?” “Go, flight.” “EE-com?” “Go, flight.” “Soft focus on the girl?” “Go, flight.”
2011-09-23 01:16:38
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Now, I will attempt to explain why we were not in radio contact all along.”
2011-09-23 01:17:24
@lousycanuck: @MockTM ALT MILES? Oh, Alternative Miles. For the hipster astronauts who thought miles were too mainstream.
2011-09-23 01:17:42
@blakestacey: @MockTM “The human body can withstand these accelerations. . . bow chicka wow wow.”
2011-09-23 01:17:54
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Harry, come look at the Earth. It’s so romantic. Very… made of chemicals.
2011-09-23 01:18:32
@szvan: @MockTM “Hey, chin, come enjoy an Earth-set with a girl, would ya?”
2011-09-23 01:18:39
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Standby to turn…EVIL.”
2011-09-23 01:19:04
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Stand by to lean… lean now… Continue leaning…
2011-09-23 01:19:28
@szvan: @MockTM This would be the point of the movie where we discover than one turns in space by the gyroscopic action of the crew.
2011-09-23 01:19:54
@DrRubidium: @MockTM why is everyone in Mission Control crowded around on device to hear the call? They’re called “speakers”, NASA!
2011-09-23 01:20:30
2011-09-23 01:21:04
@blakestacey: @MockTM They’ve yet to reach *outer* space; are currently cruising around middle space.
2011-09-23 01:21:33
@lousycanuck: @MockTM It’s like a nice cool night in near-absolute-zero Texas.
2011-09-23 01:21:49
@blakestacey: @MockTM fun fact: in 1950, “stand by” sounded incredibly futuristic.
2011-09-23 01:22:04
@lousycanuck: @MockTM RX-M calling Geico… We just got into a collision with our own tail section.
2011-09-23 01:22:41
@szvan: @MockTM Sorry, mission control, we’re having a hard time hearing you over this space rain.
2011-09-23 01:23:28
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Come in RXM, come in RXM, your bass line is overwhelming your vocals…”
2011-09-23 01:23:28
@blakestacey: @MockTM “I promise to hand you any news as it may come in; in the meantime, follow us on Twitter…”
2011-09-23 01:23:59
@djclarkin: @MockTM Wait a minute, did they just pass their own tail, they are headed in the wrong direction.
2011-09-23 01:24:06
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Press, be aware that we will continue to spoonfeed you accepted propaganda.” Good to know nothing’s changed in 60 yrs.
2011-09-23 01:24:07
@szvan: @MockTM “This eternal night is soooo oppressive.” “Go stand on the other side of the rocket. You know, where the sun is.”
2011-09-23 01:24:30
@DrRubidium: @MockTM OK, how fast can they kill off this Texas guy? He’s working my last nerve
2011-09-23 01:24:36
@lousycanuck: @MockTM TEXAS? A MERE SPECK!?!?! Why it’s at least TWICE as big a speck as those OTHER states!!
2011-09-23 01:25:00
@blakestacey: @MockTM “A fella can get used to anything, ‘cept maybe gays marryin’.”
2011-09-23 01:25:08
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Don’t you think it’s amusing that only jackets and bedstraps are affected by zero-G?”
2011-09-23 01:25:49
@szvan: @MockTM Look! In zero gravity, things start moving all on their own.
2011-09-23 01:25:50
@blakestacey: @MockTM “It’s just the lack of gravity, which has been unnoticeable until now.”
2011-09-23 01:26:02
@DrRubidium: @MockTM “how does a girl like you get mixed up in a thing like this?” Lady Doc: I’m a fucking scientist you asshole!
2011-09-23 01:26:11
@szvan: @MockTM “Honey, why are you working so hard all the time?” “Have you looked in the mirror?”
2011-09-23 01:26:18
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “I’ve been wondering, how does a chin like you get mixed up in this kind of thing?”
2011-09-23 01:26:20
@lousycanuck: @MockTM The “pressurize the engine room” theme sounded significantly like the Wizard of Oz Flying Monkeys theme.
2011-09-23 01:27:12
@blakestacey: @MockTM Pressurizing the motor room gets quite the fanfare.
2011-09-23 01:27:13
@djclarkin: @MockTM motor room pressure up after that previous exchange
2011-09-23 01:27:26
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Careful, don’t fall off that catwalk! In this zero gravity, you might sprain something when you land!
2011-09-23 01:28:07
@blakestacey: @MockTM “We’re still drifting, like a couple beat poets on Route 66.”
2011-09-23 01:28:29
@lousycanuck: @blakestacey Hey, don’t knock it. Even astronauts get their kicks on route 66. @MockTM
2011-09-23 01:29:00
@szvan: @MockTM Luckily, all that absent gravity isn’t affecting any of the guys standing around looking glum. Just their stuff.
2011-09-23 01:29:18
@djclarkin: @MockTM Who did the incidental music, hanna barbera?
2011-09-23 01:30:00
@blakestacey: @MockTM Harmonica: susceptible to microgravity. Necktie: immune.
2011-09-23 01:30:00
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Hey, come back here, harmonica! Stop flying away from me! Stupid zero gravity, affecting musical instruments.
2011-09-23 01:30:12
@DrRubidium: @MockTM Of course the lady scientist is wrong in her calculations and acts “like a woman”
2011-09-23 01:30:51
@lousycanuck: @MockTM You speak as calmly as though you were saying “pass the misogyny.”
2011-09-23 01:30:54
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Hello? Yes? No, I’m not interested in changing phone providers, thanks.
2011-09-23 01:31:34
@blakestacey: @MockTM Ah, the classic, heroic “telescope dome” theme!
2011-09-23 01:32:27
@lousycanuck: @MockTM So, the woman was right about the calculations after all. Ain’t that going to stick in Pencil Moustache’s craw.
2011-09-23 01:32:30
@szvan: @MockTM So our physicist will have to die as well. Otherwise, he’s going to have to admit he was wrong.
2011-09-23 01:32:51
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Hey chin, is this Christmas story going somewhere? The graphs. Today.
2011-09-23 01:33:18
@szvan: @MockTM More importantly, he’s going to have to admit she was right.
2011-09-23 01:33:32
@blakestacey: @MockTM “It’s a line from a Kipling poem about solar wind.”
2011-09-23 01:33:47
@blakestacey: @MockTM “That would have been even easier if his arm had been floating in zero-G.”
2011-09-23 01:34:37
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Come over here and see something no human has ever seen before.” “A mirror?” “No, a woman that can do math.” “Oh Chin.”
2011-09-23 01:35:07
@djclarkin: @MockTM poor lloyd was typecast early on, he never did bust out of it.
2011-09-23 01:36:34
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Yep, moonlight has an effect on women. It’s like the solar system’s own roofie.”
2011-09-23 01:36:43
@DrRubidium: @MockTM why is space so LOUD?!?!
2011-09-23 01:36:54
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Fine scientist I am, thinking about ice cream flecks on coffee. Stupid roofie-moon.”
2011-09-23 01:36:58
@djclarkin: @MockTM Metors!
2011-09-23 01:37:35
@szvan: @MockTM Moonlight makes life so much better…and so much shorter.
2011-09-23 01:37:39
@blakestacey: @MockTM It’s a given that a scientist would use “it was like coffee” as a romantic simile.
2011-09-23 01:37:46
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Whoa! Those meteorites rushing by, making all that sound flying through the vacuum! They totally woke us all up!
2011-09-23 01:38:02
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Oops, I’ve been calling Bridges Chin. THIS GUY is the Chin.
2011-09-23 01:38:30
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Keep it down out there! I’m trying to work my dubious charms!”
2011-09-23 01:38:35
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Boy, that was random, and astronomically impossible.”
2011-09-23 01:39:06
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “You’ll have to add 12% to O-16.” “Right, add 16% to O-12.” “No, it’s –” “Stop telling me what to do, woman.
2011-09-23 01:39:09
@szvan: @MockTM Now that I’ve slept while you worked, are you willing to concede that my work is better than yours?
2011-09-23 01:39:15
@DrRubidium: @MockTM on an unrelated note, Jeff Bridges looks A LOT like his dad
2011-09-23 01:39:28
@szvan: @MockTM Clearly, someone has Ratchet and Clank grav boots.
2011-09-23 01:40:05
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Wow, it still takes a lot of effort to pick things up in zero gravity.
2011-09-23 01:40:12
@DrRubidium: @MockTM OK, the head scientist dude is working my last motherfucking nerve. Time for him to be smoked by something.
2011-09-23 01:40:19
@djclarkin: @MockTM They did acknowledge there was no sound in space during the Kipling reference, or did I misaprehend? re:meteors
2011-09-23 01:40:32
@blakestacey: @MockTM Wait, did they pressurize the motor room? Without the fanfare, I can’t tell!
2011-09-23 01:40:51
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Rocket Dildo… burning out its motor up here alone.
2011-09-23 01:41:20
@blakestacey: @MockTM “The mathematical theory is beyond question. Shut up and bring me a sandwich, Miss Sophie Germain.”
2011-09-23 01:41:43
@szvan: @MockTM It’s such a good thing that fuel isn’t limited in space.
2011-09-23 01:42:09
@blakestacey: @MockTM You know, this would go a lot easier if you didn’t throw yourself across the room like that.
2011-09-23 01:42:26
@blakestacey: @MockTM “They are completely off course. Must have had the chick doing the math.”
2011-09-23 01:42:46
@djclarkin: @MockTM Turn down the ventilators please!
2011-09-23 01:42:47
@szvan: @MockTM Well, I guess that’s one way to get everyone breathing heavily.
2011-09-23 01:43:13
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Looks like they put Sir Isaac Newton in the driver’s seat, and he’s out to bitch-slap Leibniz and pop a cap in a counterfeiter.”
2011-09-23 01:43:44
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “We must have been deprived of oxygen for days.” “Oh, good. Then we’re safe now.”
2011-09-23 01:43:49
@szvan: @MockTM Yes, it’s the *velocity* that’s a problem in space.
2011-09-23 01:44:01
@blakestacey: @MockTM “How long has it been?” “I’m afraid we’ll never know…oh, wait, here’s my watch. Seven minutes!”
2011-09-23 01:44:41
@szvan: @MockTM These are not the impossibilities you’re looking for.
2011-09-23 01:45:39
@djclarkin: @MockTM we’ve accidentally been slingshoted by Newtonian physics past the moon to Mars!
2011-09-23 01:46:11
@szvan: @MockTM I guess making everyone pass out keeps you from having to write a script to cover the journey.
2011-09-23 01:46:12
@DrRubidium: @MockTM So… the key to getting to Mars is to attempt to travel to somewhere else entirely
2011-09-23 01:46:46
@blakestacey: @MockTM “I don’t know quite how to tell you, so why don’t you just look out the window which is plainly within sight?”
2011-09-23 01:46:46
@szvan: @MockTM “I’ve found it!” “What?” “My next line in the script! It’s been a while.”
2011-09-23 01:47:44
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Mars. I’ll be darned. It’s almost as big as Texas.”
2011-09-23 01:47:45
@djclarkin: @MockTM @blakestacey & as dry
2011-09-23 01:48:34
@szvan: @MockTM Beep. Beep. Beep.
2011-09-23 01:48:47
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Since the gravity of Mars is only half – er, a third – er, of Earth…”
2011-09-23 01:49:03
@DrRubidium: @MockTM why the HELL aren’t they using the metric system? 😀
2011-09-23 01:49:19
@blakestacey: @MockTM “All crew members to maximum lean!”
2011-09-23 01:49:25
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Altitude 40 miles. Please fly the highlighted route. In…35…miles, increase thrust.”
2011-09-23 01:50:31
@szvan: @MockTM “We won’t need pressure suits.” “But my pressure suit feels…so…. *sigh*”
2011-09-23 01:51:35
@blakestacey: @MockTM “1000 feet, 500 feet, 400 feet…whoops…bit of a hill there.”
2011-09-23 01:51:49
@szvan: @MockTM Wait. Mars is like Oz?
2011-09-23 01:52:09
@lousycanuck: @MockTM So Mars is a Sepia-filtered Nevada. Good to know.
2011-09-23 01:52:13
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Good to know all that flying silicate dust won’t hurt their exposed eyeballs. Otherwise they couldn’t use their Space Binoculars.
2011-09-23 01:53:51
@DrRubidium: @MockTM Mars looks a lot like the Mojave desert 😀
2011-09-23 01:53:51
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Explorers log, day 1. The Martian atmosphere contains large amounts of sepia.”
2011-09-23 01:53:52
@szvan: @MockTM Mars gots theremins?
2011-09-23 01:54:35
@blakestacey: @MockTM “You know what would be perfect right here? A casino built like a pyramid, that’s what.”
2011-09-23 01:54:39
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Immense deposits of pitchblende” = foreshadowing? Taking all bets!
2011-09-23 01:55:30
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Ohhh the astronaut went over the mountain, to see what he could see. “Rock and sand, sand and rock. That’s all I see.”
2011-09-23 01:55:31
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “From what I heard, the martians have exposed brains in glass domes and go NAK NAK.”
2011-09-23 01:55:58
@djclarkin: @MockTM So the Texan feels at home?
2011-09-23 01:55:59
@blakestacey: @MockTM “All we’ve seen so far is rocks and sand. I wanna see one of these Martians…I read that they like cows…you know, ‘like’ like.”
2011-09-23 01:56:58
@szvan: @MockTM Arrest her! She has a camera! She’s a terrorist!
2011-09-23 01:56:59
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Oh, that’s just an obviously intelligently designed building, never mind that. Look, a Martian tree!!
2011-09-23 01:57:00
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Hey, it’s a red wagon, and a beat-up old stuffed tiger.”
2011-09-23 01:57:48
@szvan: @blakestacey @MockTM “Unlike their friends, the shaved sheep, they’ve got skinny feet.”
2011-09-23 01:58:09
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Ah, we’re talking Fallout-style radiation. They’ll probably pop some Rad-Away when they get back to the Space Dildo.
2011-09-23 01:58:27
@djclarkin: @MockTM A Scifi flick with a message, no wonder it never became popular 😉
2011-09-23 01:59:15
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Let’s use this precious time as best we can. Who’s up for a game of Martian Charades?”
2011-09-23 01:59:42
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Wow, called it. That’s Fallout-style radiation for sure.
2011-09-23 02:00:23
@blakestacey: @MockTM This guy has a tenured professorship in jump-to-conclusion-ology.
2011-09-23 02:00:32
@djclarkin: @MockTM Okay, now it’s just gettin’ preach, damn hollywood liberals!
2011-09-23 02:00:43
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Research has shown that radiation produces mutations, deformities, sometimes superpowers…”
2011-09-23 02:01:32
@szvan: @MockTM “There are men out there!” “Let’s abandon our defensible position immediately!”
2011-09-23 02:02:24
@blakestacey: @MockTM Uh-oh, they’ve wandered into the Hall of the Mountain King.
2011-09-23 02:02:49
@DrRubidium: @MockTM “That’s the kind of chance we’ll have to take.” Me: Oh hell no!
2011-09-23 02:02:56
@blakestacey: @MockTM [from offscreen] “Watch out for snakes!”
2011-09-23 02:03:18
@szvan: @MockTM Methinks someone has never seen a horror movie before.
2011-09-23 02:03:19
@djclarkin: @MockTM A woman found the prints & a Navaho would have to track them.,,
2011-09-23 02:03:20
@blakestacey: @MockTM “It don’t take a racist to make jokes like these.”
2011-09-23 02:03:43
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Look, it’s a Space Neanderthal! And she’s… kinda hot!!
2011-09-23 02:04:08
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Damn. It’s a crisis which doesn’t call for leaning, and that’s all we’re good at.”
2011-09-23 02:04:32
@djclarkin: @MockTM Once again, don’t underestimate the soundtrack is all I’m sayin’
2011-09-23 02:04:39
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Ah, the blind leading the mutated.
2011-09-23 02:04:53
@szvan: @MockTM Rocketship X-M. Predicting King of Queens almost 60 years ahead of time.
2011-09-23 02:05:17
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Evidently the human party is being assaulted by the Martian Lacrosse Team.
2011-09-23 02:05:38
@djclarkin: @MockTM “from atomic age to stone age” nwas that an economic reference?
2011-09-23 02:06:12
@lousycanuck: @MockTM The lead scientist has fallen via a murderous half-field pass.
2011-09-23 02:07:13
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Crazed, despairing wretches, like teenagers on prom night…”
2011-09-23 02:07:54
@djclarkin: @MockTM When did the movie switch to GalaxyQuest?
2011-09-23 02:07:56
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Jeez, how many bullets do you have in that thing? What is it, a 28-shooter?
2011-09-23 02:08:16
@blakestacey: @MockTM He faceplants, I facepalm…
2011-09-23 02:08:47
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Without a check from Harry, I have no way of knowing whether my girl-math is even right!”
2011-09-23 02:09:03
@blakestacey: @MockTM @lousycanuck Every time he fires off-screen, he reloads.
2011-09-23 02:09:13
@szvan: @MockTM I know I’m the scientist, and the only useful person aboard, but I’m female. I must be the nurse.
2011-09-23 02:09:15
@DrRubidium: @MockTM This is no time for romance! Get the hell off that planet!
2011-09-23 02:09:25
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “Can you do something for me please?” “Yes?” “Go fuck yourself.”
2011-09-23 02:10:05
@djclarkin: @MockTM @lousycanuck “without a check…I’m outta here”
2011-09-23 02:10:22
@blakestacey: @MockTM “You’re a pretty swell girl, for a girl.”
2011-09-23 02:10:27
@szvan: @MockTM “I wish I could help, but all I have to offer is my chin.”
2011-09-23 02:11:14
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “I’m sorry. If I had only gotten my chin in the way of those rocks… I coulda saved ’em.”
2011-09-23 02:11:21
@blakestacey: @MockTM “RXM calling Houston…can’t get these two lovebirds to shut the frak up…”
2011-09-23 02:11:42
@DrRubidium: @MockTM I’m not sure I want any of these people to survive
2011-09-23 02:12:19
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Wow, look at that girl falling apart under pressure. Just like the stereotypes.
2011-09-23 02:12:35
@szvan: @DrRubidium @MockTM Maybe they’ll crash-land on top of control?
2011-09-23 02:12:59
@djclarkin: @MockTM Maybe we’re smarter than the Martians…
2011-09-23 02:13:01
@blakestacey: @MockTM “We must contact base…don’t hurry or anything…”
2011-09-23 02:13:55
@szvan: @MockTM Can I please talk to the male scientist?
2011-09-23 02:14:13
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “They’ve contacted the RX-M! Something about cavemen and Lacrosse and nihilism. I think they found some bad acid on Mars.”
2011-09-23 02:14:18
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Everyone’s dejected that their favorite pencil-moustache will never be seen on Earth again.
2011-09-23 02:15:06
@blakestacey: @MockTM “Repeat that again…you say you were doomed by a woman’s incompetence? That she should have stayed in the kitchen?”
2011-09-23 02:15:12
@DrRubidium: @MockTM Hold me? Hold me?! Sweet Christ! Crash into the planet already.
2011-09-23 02:15:17
@djclarkin: @MockTM We didn’t join the antigrav club
2011-09-23 02:15:51
@lousycanuck: @MockTM “We can say that time is behind us, our past is our future, our behind is in our past, our future flies like a banana.”
2011-09-23 02:16:14
@djclarkin: @MockTM Oh, maybe they did
2011-09-23 02:16:25
@DrRubidium: @MockTM RXM-2? Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
2011-09-23 02:17:20
@lousycanuck: @MockTM HEY! So THAT’S what Peggy’s Cove lighthouse is — it’s the remains of the Rocketship X-M.
2011-09-23 02:17:28
@szvan: @MockTM No, their deaths are not a failure, just a proof of concept.
2011-09-23 02:17:44
@lousycanuck: @MockTM THE END. Lesson: don’t live in Nova Scotia or rocket ships will fall on your head.
2011-09-23 02:18:22
@szvan: @MockTM The movies where everyone dies at the end are the best.
2011-09-23 02:18:53
@lousycanuck: @MockTM Lesson: Girls can’t do math. Never mind that the girl was the only one that did the math right.
2011-09-23 02:19:40
@djclarkin: @MockTM Enjoyed this, hope the additions didn’t subtract from it…;-)
2011-09-23 02:20:52

Mock The Movie: Rocketship X-M transcript

3 thoughts on “Mock The Movie: Rocketship X-M transcript

  1. 1

    Incredibly funny reading, thanks for posting this!

    But you might want to edit it: You pasted a lot of it multiple times; passages beginning with the bit about NASA speakers are in the transcript multiple times. At the end it was mostly scrolling over the repetitions.

    Still awesome jokes. 😀

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