Gay men, lesbians, bisexuals, transgendered people, and people with alternative gender identities who identify as neither male nor female or as both male and female: Can you talk about gender role expectations in dating and sex? Do you perceive an expectation that men make the first move in dating and sex, and/or that women wait for others to make the first move in dating and sex?
If you do: Can you say more about that? How has this affected you? How has it affected your dating life and your relationships? How has it affected other people in your life — men, women, or alternatively gendered? If you’re not actively dating now (because you’re partnered, have decided to be single, etc.) but have in the past — how has this affected you in the past?
And do you think you see these questions differently from traditionally gendered people in opposite-sex dating lives? If you think these expectations exist, have they had an affect on your identity as a gay man, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered person, or person with alternative gender identity? Do you think these expectations have an effect on the queer community and the queer dating scene?
And if you don’t feel this — if you either don’t think such an expectation exists, or you think it exists but don’t feel like it’s affected your life — please tell me about that as well.
You can answer in the comments — or, if you prefer more privacy than that, you can email me, greta (at) gretachristina (dot) com. Again: This is for a piece I’m writing, so please let me know how you want your name cited if I quote you, or if you want to only be quoted anonymously, or what. (If you don’t say otherwise, I’ll assume it’s okay to quote you with handle or first name only.) Thanks!