Last week, my mothers- in- law gave me a gravy boat for a late birthday present. (Three gravy boats, actually. Long story.)
This morning, Ingrid and I went out for breakfast, and brought home the leftover biscuits that we didn’t eat.
And this afternoon, when I got home from breakfast, I found a religious tract that had been slipped under our door.
Jesus H. Christ with biscuits and gravy.
The fundies are rubbing off on you– this is so *literal* 😉
Ah yes, that would be the Jehovah’s Witnesses inviting you to their annual “Memorial of Jesus’ Death”. Five years ago, that could have been me leaving that tract under your door. Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster I’m now an atheist.
When I read “biscuits and gravy” my mind automatically thinks about cookies or crackers (what Australians as a whole call biscuits) and not bread rolls (which we call, funnily enough, bread rolls). Certainly brings to mind some odd flavours!
That… that is beautiful.
I would have used the tract as a place mat.
That looks like very rough toilet paper!
Tall Penguin: biscuits are much nearer to savoury scones than they are to bread rolls.
So did you eat the biscuits or read the tracts?
I worked with a Christian Outreach group in India and we actually used our old tracts for toilet paper which seemed weird and freeing at that time. Sort of like the Zen saying, “When you meet the Buddha, kill him.”
We did eat the biscuits. I looked at the tract, but it didn’t say anything I hadn’t seen a hundred times before, so I pitched it. The biscuits were delicious, though.
Is “Jesus H. Christ with biscuits and gravy” a common expression? Whereabouts? I’ve never heard it before.
Madrigalia:
There are many variations on this expression. It’s just colorful swearing, basically. Some of my favorites include:
Jesus H. Christ on a raft
J.H.C. on a crutch
J.H.C. on a popsicle stick
…I think you get the idea. For the ultimate in inventive variations, see the sadly defunct (but recently re-printed! Yay!) comic book “Sam and Max” by Steve Purcell. There you will find such gems as:
Sweet Jesus in a smoking birch bark canoe!
and the immortal:
Holy Jumping Mother O’God in a sidecar with chocolate jimmies and a lobster bib!
The possibilities are as limitless as the human imagination.
…So what you’re saying is that you don’t so much have a gravy boat as you have a gravy flotilla. 🙂
I just finished reading John Irving’s new book wherein one of the main character’s favorite expression is “constipated christ”. That would be tougher to photograph.
Aunt Marcia