Donors Choose: Bring the Hammer Down!

I’m not a natively competitive person, and I don’t foresee any actual losers in the Science  Bloggers For Students 2011 challenges, considering that everyone’s involved in an excellent cause. The kids will see nothing but win. But some of us humans need a good friendly rivalry to motivate us. In which case, this is a science celebrity death match and WE WILL PWN YOU SUCKAZ!!!

I can smell the desperation in the air. Check out these two tweets, which simultaneously amused me and made me extremely damned proud of my readers.

[blackbirdpie url=”http://twitter.com/#!/docfreeride/status/127214857467604992″]

My, my. Black magic, even so. And what’s forced them to take these desperate measures?

Our status as of 12:30am PDT

Why, I do believe that would be us, my darlings! Granted, we’re two bucks shy of the full lead amount, but still, we are responsible for that sound of quivering knees emanating from Scientopia’s neck o’ the blogosphere.

Do you need proof? Thee shall have it:

[blackbirdpie url=”http://twitter.com/#!/drugmonkeyblog/status/127218562669613056″]

We are not merely on the move. We have got hammers. And we are about to bring them down.

Two donors today contributed $160, and I did my $200 match, so Mr. Minkler’s kids need a mere $576 for their field trip to Great Basin National Park. This blog gets over 400 hits per day. Let’s be pessimistic, and say it’s only 400, and moreover, it’s always the same 400 people. That’s less than $2 each to completely fund this project.

Now, not everybody’s going to donate. Some of you have already given generously, more than once. Some of you are starving students who haven’t got a spare dime. But I’m sure there’s plenty of us who could scrounge round in a pocket and come up with $5 or $10. And if you do that between now and the end of the challenge Saturday night, you’re going to get some extra fundage to toss into any project you like. So, go for it.

Mr. Minkler would be very happy. Just look at the note he sent me today:

Mr. Minkler just posted this message for Discovering the Wonders of Nevada:

“Hi Dana, We are crazy about you! Thank you so much for helping us get our kids to GBNP. We had one project completely funded through your blog. You are the best.”

That’s you. You are the best. He and his kids are crazy about you. Because you, my darlings, are the ones making this happen for them.

And if you’re here for the fiction rather than the rocks, and you’d rather support a classroom library, Stephanie’s got a project who’s time is running desperate short. Go buy some kids a book instead. I want Mr. Minkler’s kids to make it to the Great Basin, of course, but us rock-obsessed folk will get them there.

Everyone on Freethought Blogs has got a Donors Choose badge. Go explore until something tickles your fancy, and then put a few bucks in. Even – and this is heresy – head over to one of those other science blogging networks and see if they have anything that catches your eye. Sure, you won’t get any of the fancy incentives I’m offering. But you’ll still have helped students get the things they need, and I can tell you from experience that’s a wonderful, warm, fuzzy feeling.

These kids are the future. Our future. Give them what they need to fall in love with learning, and ensure their futures are full of win. Geos and other adorers of the good science of rock breaking: bring the hammer down. Get Mr. Minkler’s kids out in the field.

I’ll republish the incentives below the fold for those who need reminding. And for those who need competition more than incentives for motivation: DO NOT LET THOSE BLACK-MAGIC WIELDING HEATHENS AT SCIENTOPIA BEST US! NOT WHEN WE’RE SO CLOSE TO TROUNCING THEIR ARSES!

1. I’ll write a short story for the highest donor. You can even choose the subject, if you like, and you’ll get a paper copy complete with autograph, if you wish. You’ll have to give me until the end of the year, because I’m stupid enough to try NaNo this November, but I’ll have it written and sent to you in January. Yes, I will haul my arse to the hated post office just for you.

2. The second-highest donor will get a personally-collected hand sample. That’s right! I’ll post a list of places I’m going this summer (once I know what they are!), and you tell me what hunk o’ beautiful geology you want me to package up and mail to you.

3. I’ll match 4 (count them, 4) donations of $50. So you $50 folk get to double your money! Don’t let that stop you from donating more, of course! And if you guys manage to fund these projects before I can whip my credit card out, you can each pick a project of your own for me to donate to. Done.

4. Starving Students Offer: Those of you too strapped for cash to manage more than small donations can still get a little something! Send me an email telling me what you’re studying, why you chose your major, and why you donated, and I’ll showcase you guys on the site. Plus, I’ll write a poem for the person whose note makes me punch the air and shout, “Yes! Science can haz future!” Same caveats apply as the short story deal.

5. I’ve also got some super-snazzy Mount St. Helens posters, so all who have donated to any of our projects and want their names in for that have a chance at winning one of Mother Earth’s great works of art.

Yahoo knows me as dhunterauthor. Get hammering and get stuff!

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Donors Choose: Bring the Hammer Down!
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