Dumbfuckery du Jour

Can Cons really get any more hypocritical and ridiculous?  Haley Barbour is suddenly of the opinion that tax cuts must be paid forif they’re tax cuts suggested by those dirty Dems, that is:

Yesterday, in an attempt to reach out to Republicans and jump start the economy, President Obama proposed new tax breaks for businesses, which would allow them to write off the cost of new investment in plants and equipment through 2011. 
[snip]
In an interview with the National Review, Mississippi Gov. Haley Barbour (R), whom Politico recently dubbed “the most powerful Republican in politics,” called Obama’s proposal “very good.” However, in keeping with the GOP’s reflexive opposition anything to Obama supports, Barbour said the “problem” with Obama’s plan is that “we do not know how he will pay for it“…

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.  This is the party of tax cuts pay for themselves.  The party of “you should never have to offset cost” of tax cuts.  The party of tax cuts “expand tax revenue.”  The party of the Tax Fairy.  This is the party that has been wailing and screaming and howling for tax cuts, positive that our every woe requires nothing more than a good tax cut to fix it, and damn the expense – until the President of the United States is a Democrat proposing tax cuts, in which case tax cuts maybe aren’t so magical and must be paid for.  ZOMG WTF???

Double fucking standards, anyone?

Dumbfuckery du Jour
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A Shout-Out to My Readers, Established and New

You people are amazing.

When I wrote up my college field trip experience for the Accretionary Wedge, I spent most of my time doubting whether I should do it.  “Ogod, I I I me me me– I’m sick of I, and so is everyone else!”  Seriously debated whether that wretched thing should be published.  Did it anyway because, well, what the hell.  At least you guys could look at the pretty pictures and skip the text.

Then Chris Rowan tweeted it, and so did Brian Romans (twice!) and Silver FoxAndrew Alden blogged it.  Callan Bentley, David Orr (who does dinos, too!), Lockwood, Coconino, and Suzanne all said incredibly kind things.  And I suspect the sudden influx of followers on Twitter is somehow related.

I had no idea that babbling would strike such a chord.  I shall now promptly give the credit for that post to Jim Bennett, because without him, never would’ve happened.  Credit also goes to you, my dear readers, because without you, there’s no reason to spend time babbling on this blog.  You truly make this all worthwhile. 

So, my dear Silver Fox, yes, I will become your ghost writer, and pay need not be discussed.  Compliments (and field trips!) are coinage enough.  Same goes for all of you.  Only problem is, you lot don’t need a ghostwriter – I’ve read your work, and believe me when I say that a ghostwriter would only get in the way of already perfect prose.  You inspire, entertain, inform and enlighten just fine on your own.  All I’d be there for is cleaning up the occasional typo.  Which, I’ll have you know, is perfectly satisfactory if it means I get to spend more time with you!

Each day, I carry you with me.  When I’m out on adventures, I’m thinking of you.  Every time I snap a photo these days, it’s with the thought of what might delight you.  You make these excursions far more meaningful than they would be otherwise.  Every time there’s a new post from you, my world expands.  You’re everything I’ve ever wanted or needed.  Figured you should know that, and refer back to that truth in case you’re ever feeling like no one appreciates you.

I do.  And I know I’m not alone.

A Shout-Out to My Readers, Established and New

A Shout-Out to Evergreen and Union-Negotiated Health Insurance

Wednesday was fun.  About half an hour into my shift, the mild discomfort I’d been feeling announced itself as a full-blown kidney stone.  I’m prone to the bastards, and apparently the one that had announced its existence a few months ago didn’t so much pass as await a better opportunity.  Anyone who’s had these before knows it’s an exquisite form of agony.  Sometimes, it’s only moderate torture, and you can ride it out with the proper swear words.  But since I can’t scream profanities at work, I decided a trip to the ER for some nice happy drugs was in order.

Now, I’ve been to a lot of hospitals for these stupid things.  I’ve had to wait in the waiting room for hours before getting a doctor, and been put through the excitement of having to register before being seen.  The last thing you want to do while your kidney feels like it’s simultaneously imploding and exploding after being blowtorched is answer questions about your insurance.  I wasn’t looking forward to it.

But when I got to Evergreen Hospital‘s ER, a gentleman zipped out to meet me, whisked me back for a blood pressure and temp check, slapped the plastic bracelet on, and said they’d call me right back.  I don’t think the whole thing took more than five minutes.  I had time to call my intrepid companion and alert him to the fact I’d need a ride home, and then they were ushering me right to an exam room.  I’d barely gotten the gown on before a nurse was there – with bad news.  They had to check for blood in ye olde urine before they’d start the good drugs.  This, I thought, would take ages.  But no – about fifteen minutes after producing a sample, she was back with the great good news that I did, indeed, have a stone, and it was time for the blessed relief.  Wasn’t her fault that just as she was putting the IV in, the damned thing passed.  All that drama for naught.

The ER doc, who is one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met, decided we’d best ensure the little bugger wasn’t just playing possum, so we waited a bit.  He sent me home a little over an hour later with a prescription for the good stuff and an apology for taking so long with the discharge papers – they were horribly busy.

You never would have guessed it from the speed with which they handled my case, start to finish.  That place is amazing.  I wish every hospital could have an ER that functioned so smoothly.  And it’s one of the only hospitals I know of that sends someone in to get you registered only after you’re no longer in agony.

In fact, they left me feeling so good (even without drugs, hee hee) that I went back to work for the rest of the evening.

They did a fantastic job, they’ve got a wonderful hospital with an exceptional staff, and they deserve recognition for the tremendous work they do.  So, my dear Evergreen: thank you from the bottom of my heart (and my kidney)!

And there’s another reason I’m telling you about my ridiculous little medical woes: it points up the value of good health insurance.  Everyone in this country should be able to have the experience I had.  When the pain hit, I didn’t have to suffer.  My union-negotiated health care’s got me covered (theoretically, anyway).  So well, in fact, that when I checked out, there wasn’t even a copay. 

Now, single-payer would be a fuck of a lot better – I wouldn’t have had to do that frantic little do-I-or-don’t-I-have-my-insurance-card-on-me check.  But having good insurance is certainly the next-best thing.  We’re on our way to that with the Affordable Care Act.  No, it’s not going to be perfect at first.  Yes, insurers will kick up a fuss and try to wriggle out of their obligations and in general make this as miserable as possible.  Cons will try to tear the law down rather than building it up, and too many “moderate” Dems will be more than happy to help them with the wrecking ball.  But if we, the sick and those who could get sick without prior notice, keep the pressure for a better health care system on, it won’t just be the union members and other suck lucky folk who have good coverage.  We can take this Act and build on it.

So, thanks to my union for ensuring I’m well-insured.  And thanks to those who had the courage to vote for the first steps to ensuring the whole country’s well-insured.  That’s the first skirmish won – keep fighting for more!

Finally, huge thanks to my intrepid companion, who stood by ready to drive my loopy self home if they’d had to pump me full of painkillers, and who even cleaned out his car, and let me ruin his afternoon plans, just so he could be told his services weren’t necessary.  Friends like that are solid gold.  I can’t ever express in words how much he means to me, and I suck at performance art, so a simple “Thanks, man” will just have to symbolize the whole.

A Shout-Out to Evergreen and Union-Negotiated Health Insurance

Dumbfuckery du Jour

Republicans have somehow convinced enough people that taxes = pure evil to make increasing taxes well-nigh impossible.  Witness the fruits of their labor:

A month ago, the New York Times reported that cash-strapped states and municipalities are resorting to “major life-changing cuts in core services.” This includes four-day weeks for public schools, local bus systems being shut down, and turning off streetlights in Colorado Springs. The report came on the heels of a Wall Street Journal piece about several state governments cutting back on paved roads, because they can only afford gravel. More recently, we learned that struggling public schools, finding their budgets slashed, used to simply require students to bring in glue, scissors, and crayons. They’re now demanding that families provide everything from paper towels to garbage bags to liquid soap. In one instance, children are asked to even bring in toilet paper.
Today the NYT reports on “a nascent budget-balancing trend in municipal government: police and fire departments have begun to charge accident victims as a way to offset budget cuts.”

Ambulance charges have long been common and are usually paid by health insurance, but fees for other responders are relatively new. The charge is variously called a “crash tax” or “resource recovery,” depending on one’s point of view. In either case, motorists are billed for services they may have thought were covered by taxpayers.

Sometimes the victim’s insurer pays. But if it declines, motorists may face threats from a collection agency if they don’t pay.

The AAA opposes such fees, said Jill Ingrassia, managing director for government relations and traffic safety advocacy. “Generally, we see that public safety services are a core government function that should be properly budgeted for with general taxes and not addressed by fees after the fact,” she said.

Ms. Ingrassia says such charges can place an “undue burden on motorists who can’t choose the size or duration of an emergency response,” which means they cannot control the size of the bill they may get. “We also really don’t want to discourage any motorist involved in a crash from calling for police or rescue services if they fear they are going to be billed for it,” she said.

Now, I’m sure Cons will start babbling about how charging accident victims enforces personal responsibility, makes us drive more carefully, and that accident-free people shouldn’t have to pay for other people’s bad driving.  They’ll repeat such tropes ad nauseum  – right up until they’re the ones in an accident, when they’ll instantly start shrieking about how outrageous it is to have to pay for a police response.  Not that they’ll see the light and authorize a tax increase to pay for basic emergency services – they’ll just demand we do something like let poor people starve to death in the streets (but not any streets where sensitive Cons might see their icky dead bodies).  Budget cuts, we’re told, are the solution to every governmental budget woe – as long as those cuts only impact the icky poor people who do awful things like vote for Democrats.

Quite soon, we’ll start hearing about how emergency services would do much better if they were privatized, as the free market is almost godlike in its ability to solve our every problem.  City and state governments, they’ll say, should contract with private entities for the provision of fire and police services.  Why, that would be almost as good as cutting programs meant to help icky poor people out of the budget!  Someone should explain the history of private firefighting to them and ask if they’re pining for a return to those halcyon days of private enterprise.

Something tells me they still won’t get it even when they’re house is burning down and the private companies are too busy fighting over who’s going to put out the fire to actually put out the fire, but one can always hope that a tiny spark of sense will ignite somewhere in the depths of what passes for their brains.

I don’t hold out much hope, however.  We are talking about a group of morons who believe that $50 billion for infrastructure improvements is an outrageous, unaffordable expense (probably because it’s already paid for by removing minuscule amounts of public money from private oil companies), while around $800 billion in tax cuts for the fabulously wealthy is a bargain.  You cannot reason with people whose math skills are only equaled by Dr. Evil’s.

And in the must-be-seen-to-be-believed category, watch Teabaggers and Con candidates rally round a man who thinks stringing up murdered gays is an excellent decorative idea.  I’m sure these folks could be a lot more offensive, disgusting and morally bankrupt.  It’s just hard to imagine how.

Dumbfuckery du Jour

The Crash of Continents, the Whisper of Water

Permian Riviera

I grew up near the seashore.  Of course, the last time we could’ve played in the surf was 92 million years ago, back in the Late Cretaceous, and oceanfront property values in Arizona would’ve been abysmal when most of our land got deposited, considering we weren’t exactly oceanfront.  More like ocean bottom.  I played on rocks that got their start in life 270 million years ago in the Middle Permian, when a shallow sea covered the land in a great diagonal from Nevada to Mexico.  Not that I knew a thing about it.  Didn’t even see the sea until I was fourteen, and didn’t realize until some time after that I’d been in intimate contact with the sea floor very nearly my entire life.

The things I know now.

The Great Big Hole In the Ground

I came of age in a geological wonderland, but I had my eyes on the stars.  I’d meant to be an astronomer, but somewhere along the line I discovered that higher math and I don’t get along.  I enjoyed rocks, but I didn’t really understand them.  Hell, I thought the Navajo sandstone had been laid down in a Jurassic sea for the longest time – it’s only recently that I realized I’d actually spent my teenage years running around on lithified sand dunes.  I knew the Grand Canyon exposed two billion years of history, but couldn’t have told you what that history was.  To us, it was the great big hole in the ground that all our Midwest relations wanted to see the instant they arrived for their visits, and familiarity bred contempt.  I got so sick of the Grand Canyon I didn’t care if I ever saw it again for a good ten-year stretch.  Sedona’s magnificent red rocks elicited yawns.  Yes, they were pretty, but the people who lived near them were to a large degree absolute idiots, and the dirt stained every white bit of clothing red.  I wanted to go back to my lovely forested mountains.

What I’m saying is, I liked geology in an abstract sort of way.  Yes, there were times when I wanted to know more about the scenery, but I’m easily distracted.  I’d settled on wanting to be an SF writer, and everything from then on was subjugated to that.  When I went to college, I planned to study history, English, and creative writing.  I hadn’t realized at that point just how important science would become – writing fantasy, I figured, meant I didn’t need to know much.

Mah Mountains

You can laugh at me.  Feel free.  I laugh at myself all the time.

Colleges in America require lab science credits to graduate.  Hated that, I did.  Didn’t want to waste my precious time on something so useless, but there was no getting round it, so I inspected the catalog for something with minimal math.  Settled on Concepts in Basic Geology with Jim Bennett.  I wish I could tell you that was the lightning bolt on the road to Damascus, but I dropped the class a few weeks in because Western Civ I was kicking my arse, so was work, and I’d gotten bored with the whole scratching-rocks-on-white-porcelain thing.

But that left the Sword of Damocles hanging right above my head.  So the following year, I signed up with Jim Bennett once again for Intro to Physical Geography.  I had no idea what I was in for.  But by that time, I’d begun to realize that in order to build a proper world, one must understand how this world works, and that seemed like just the course for it.

Let me tell you a little something about Jim Bennett.  He’s the kind of man who can make the weather fascinating.  I’d spent my life believing few things are more boring than the weather (grew up in Arizona, remember), but he made it mind-bogglingly complex, and then he simplified it.  I’ll never forget stepping outside one day, seeing a few wispy clouds in the bright blue sky, and knowing we had a cold front coming through.  Time for that half an umbrella he’d whip out as weatherman for the local teevee station whenever there was a 50% chance of rain.  He’d just given me predictive power over the weather, and that, my friends, was only the beginning.

There’s a long, fairly straight road leading from I-17 to Prescott (well, Dewey).  It wends through rolling sagebrush and juniper hills, with a few road cuts slicing gray rock near the interstate that shades into dull tan dirt closer to town.  You will probably never see it on a postcard.  There’s nothing much to recommend it: no mountain vistas, no really profound landmarks, just a lot of dust and knobs of rock covered in dryland vegetation.

One day, Mr. Bennett stuffed us all into two vans and took us down that road.  We stopped just outside of Dewey.  He had something special to show us.

Young WA phyllite similar to AZ’s ancient stuff

We scrambled up a steep road cut filled with dry, crumbly dirt and a vertical streak of dark, crumbly rock.  He put his hand on the streak.  This, he told us, is a continental suture.  And these unassuming rocks were almost two billion years old.

I remember touching those crumbling bits of phyllite with awe approaching reverence.  I’d never knowingly seen a metamorphic rock before, and I hadn’t realized any existed in my humble home state.  Two continents had collided right in my very own state.  I could actually touch two separate continents here in the sleepy Arizona countryside.  This shit was unimaginably old.  It seemed far too fragile to sew two continents together, but it indubitably had, Mr. Bennett assured us.  And h
ow did he know?  Because the rocks told him so.

WA pillow lavas kinda sorta like AZ’s

They had far more to say.  He took us down to one of those dull gray roadcuts, and let us play with pillows.  I’d thought until then that pillow lava was something that only happened in Hawaii.  I’d never paid much attention to the bubbly shapes of the rocks I’d passed countless times.  And here, I could see that these lava flows must have encountered a substantial body of water in this now-dry country, piling up pillows in the process.  They towered over me, these igneous artifacts I’d thought couldn’t exist close to my home.  I patted their roundness and felt I’d made good friends.  I’d never see this road the same way again.

I’ve had an inordinate fondness for pillow lavas to this day.

Montezuma’s Weel – a desert sinkhole

Once we’d had our fill of pillows, Mr. Bennett pointed us at Montezuma’s Well.  It’s a great hole in the desert with water in, and Sinagua ruins, and I’d seen it many times as a child.  But I hadn’t ever known it was a sinkhole in the midst of a karst landscape.  Sinkholes, I’d thought, were things that happened to other people’s states, not my own.  But there it was, incontrovertible evidence that Arizona’s vast swaths of limestone sometimes do get enough water in them to do things like dissolve and collapse.  But that wasn’t the half of what it had to offer.

He led us down an inconsequential side trail, into the scrubby vegetation on the outer slope of the sinkhole.  I’d never gone that way before in all the times I’d been there – seemed there’d be nothing more to see than the usual hilly topography with cacti in that you see absolutely everywhere around Cottonwood, Arizona.  Yes, there was a creek down there, Wet Beaver Creek, called that because it usually had water in the dry season whereas Dry Beaver Creek (natch) didn’t.  But with the Verde River just a few miles away, Wet Beaver Creek wasn’t exactly a vacation destination.

Sinagua swallet

So imagine my surprise when we left the hot, dusty hills behind and descended into a cool, shady oasis with towering leafy trees and a cheerful little stream running through it.  It was, for Arizona, fabulously green and lush, covered in water-loving plants.  A limestone shoulder bumped ours, a solid and comfortable bulk that helped chase the burning sun away.  This unsuspected place had been created both by the creek and by a tiny swallet, a wee stream of water that had found a crack in the side of the sinkhole and exploited it.  The Sinagua had in turn exploited the swallet, channeling it along an irrigation ditch that still exists after almost a thousand years.  Because of a long-ago sea, this tiny lake and stream existed, a place where we lingered for a good long while before heading for red rock country and the conclusion of our field excursion.

That, my darlings, was the day my young world ended forever, and my old one began.  Continental drift went out the window: no more vague images in my mind of stately continents floating slowly about to fetch up gently against one another before drifting apart again like guests at a soiree.  The rolling hills around Dewey ceased to be the least-interesting part of the drive between old home and new: I never could pass that way again without thinking of continents going bang up against each other, crushing and transforming rock as they collided.  Rocks meant something: they weren’t just pretty baubles, but storytellers with a rich store of history to draw on.  The world changed fundamentally from era to era, and the past dictated the present.  Landscapes weren’t just scenery anymore.  They were portals to other worlds. 

That day, and that class, sent me on a quest to understand how the earth works in order to understand how the worlds I was creating must work.  Without that experience, I’m not sure I would have ever stared at a squiggle of coastline I’d just scribbled and wondered how, exactly, it had gotten to be that way, and what it might have been before.  That day sent me (eventually – these things take time to sink in fully) haring off after geology and meteorology and oceanography and biology and any number of other -ologies in an attempt to create an imagined land with a history as rich and sensible as our own.

Some folks like to say that science takes all the beauty and meaning and wonder out of life.  The only thing I can say to them is that they’ve never hopped in a van with their own Mr. Bennett and taken on a wild ride through geologic history.  They haven’t been properly introduced to the landscapes around them.  There is nothing more wonderful, meaningful or beautiful than watching the world form.  They need that one experience that shows them the world as it was, is and one day might be.

Thank you, Mr. Bennett, for handing me the keys to the geologic kingdom.  I’ll never forget the crash of continents, the whisper of water, and the awe of seeing the world again for the very first time.

The Crash of Continents, the Whisper of Water

Dumbfuckery du Jour

How many Cons does it take to keep us from changing a lightbulb (h/t)?

Unemployment remains at record highs. The economy is stuck in a rut. The US is still fighting wars on two fronts and constant threats to security here at home. But the real menace facing America? The looming phase-out of incandescent light bulbs.
That’s the second-biggest threat to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness (after healthcare reform)—at least if you’re Erick Erickson. The Red State blogger has launched a campaign to save the old-school bulbs, which, under the 2007 energy bill, are set to begin phasing out in 2012 in favor of more energy-efficient compact florescent bulbs. Erickson wants to “get every Republican out there to pledge their support to saving the incandescent light bulb when they take back Congress.”

What a putz.  Focusing the energies of Congress on saving the incandescent light bulb is Erick Erickson’s #1 priority.  I wonder if he also ran a campaign to save chalk from dry erase markers and the daguerreotype from the camera. 

Now, this would be ridiculous enough, except that there are no sane Republicans left in Congress.  Michele Bachmann and Ted Poe have already begun the crusade to save the world from the horror of energy-saving bulbs.  I can only imagine there will soon be a stampede.  Tea Partiers everywhere will be calling for the restoration of our right to use outdated bulb technology.  Cons will speechify on the stump, promising to overturn this hideous threat to our precious liberty.

Ah, well.  If it distracts them from the rabid Islamophobia and trying to repeal health care reform, I suppose we can count it good.

Dumbfuckery du Jour

The Dirty Truth

There’s a post up at Games With Words that everyone should read, whether you’re interested in politics or not.  The Republicans’ ideal world (no or lax regulations, rich getting ahead while the poor go nowhere) already exists in Russia.  This is what it looks like:

Every time I go to Russia, the first thing I notice is the air. I would say it’s like sucking on a car’s exhaust pipe, but — and this is key to my story — the air in American exhaust pipes is actually relatively fresh. You have to image black soot spewing forth from a grimy, corroded pipe. Pucker up. [That’s the first thing I notice, unless I’m in St Petersburg — In many parts of Petersburg the smell of urine overwhelms the industrial pollution. And I say this as someone who loves Petersburg.]

So whenever I read that regulations are strangling business, I think of Russia. The trash everywhere. My friends, living in a second floor apartment, complaining how the grime that comes in through the window (they can’t afford airconditioning) turns everything in the apartment grey. Gulping down breaths of sandpaper. The hell-hole that oil extraction has made of Sakhalin. Seriously, I don’t know why more post-apocalyptic movies aren’t shot in Sakhalin. Neither words nor pictures can describe the remnants of clear-cut, burnt-over forest — looking at it, not knowing how long it’s been like that, since such forests (I’m told) will almost certainly never grow back. It’s something everybody should see once.

But don’t breathe while you’re there.

And for those who wonder why, if the Democrats are such a flaming band of illiberal nitwits (which is a hypothesis I don’t completely buy, possibly because I don’t completely hate the health care bill), I’d still vote for the buggers, this is part of it:

So in theory, I could vote for a good Republican. But even if there were to be one running for office now — and I don’t think there are any — they’d still caucus with the self-destructive, nutters that make up most of the modern party.

This is not to say Democrats have no empirical blind spots (they seem to be just as likely to believe that nonsense about vaccines and Autism, for instance), but on the whole, Democrats believe in reality. More to the point, most (top) scientists and researchers are Democrats, which has to influence the party (no data here, but I have yet to meet a Republican scientist, so they can’t be that common).

So if you believe in reality, if you believe in doing what works rather than what doesn’t, if you care at all about the future of our country, and if you are eligible to vote in the US elections this Fall, vote for the Democrat (or Left-leaning independent, etc., if there’s one with a viable chance of winning). 

Democrats are far from perfect, and there are all too many of them who have the wrong damned letter after their name.  But there’s just no fucking way I can explain to my conscience why I didn’t vote against the insane fools who despise science and think regulations that keep us from breathing sandpaper in a hellscape are an unnecessary drag on business. 

Besides, far too many Dems are just dim enough to believe that if they lose, it’s because they’re not right-leaning enough, and the last thing we need is to push these politicians to the right.  They’re too far east of the center line as it is.

The Dirty Truth