The Soup: Curtis from Naughty Kitchen

So, Curtis is my new favorite person. We met in for real life last week, and he’s charming and funny. And his hair is really that… three-dimensional. It works for him, really. I think he does take a lot of shit for it though. Anyway, all that goofy stuff he says is self-aware; he is being intentionally ridiculous. But whatevs, funny!

Anyway, Curtis, who I heart, on The Soup, which I heart to death, yeah, that works for me. Maybe someday Curtis will be invited to do a goofy guest appearance with Joel McHale.

Anyway, who knows if the video will get taken down for Copyright reasons, so watch it while you can!

The Soup: Curtis from Naughty Kitchen
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Because When People Steal it Pisses Me Off

I’m re-posting this here because I think it deserves a wide circulation.  I’m really anti-stealing, but to steal a piece of art that someone has spent hours and hours creating is maybe the worst thing you can do.

Artist brute_force; had the following steampunk monocle stolen from him at Dragon*Con. It’s a one of a kind piece, so if you see it, that’s the one. There’s not another one like it.

He is offering a $200 reward for its safe return, no questions asked. He’s offering a $500 reward if it leads to the arrest of the person who stole it.

And, the kicker: if you get the thief arrested, he will make you one of these pieces. Value: a cool $1500.

Please crosspost and repost this, especially if you know lots of SCA, renfaire, gamer, anime, goth, costuming, and steampunk fans. Someone suggested covering furry and filk, too. Not a bad idea. Art theft like this really, really pisses me off. If the bastard won’t send it back, he should at least be afraid to wear it in public.

Because When People Steal it Pisses Me Off

Project Runway 605; Tim Gunn gets catty

I’m a big Project Runway fan, and last night they did one of my favorite things they’ve ever done, newspaper as the material.  I think that what I love best on PR is when they do unconventional things.  It seems the designers really make something creative and beautiful when they have to work with something different than cloth.

For the only time in recorded history, I actually liked almost everything that went down the Runway.  I mean, I even liked the origami birds that Johnny had going on until he went nuts and sent down that travesty.

I do feel like both Carol Hannah and Gordana got mistreated.  Gordana’s dress was gorgeous and I would totally wear it.  There’s something just icky to me about the judges hatred of all things “wearable”.  But, it also just didn’t look like paper.  The color, the pattern, it was all stunning.  Carol Hannah had just a really interesting concept with cascading block shapes.  It was really cool.  Logan’s dress was also gorgeous and got no attention.

I thought Christoper’s design looked kind of awful.  The “feather” effect was just… silly.  And the bodice was, well, it looked like some attempt at armor from a Monty Python film or something.  I liked the hair.  I also did not like Irina’s coat, though, I suppose, putting aside my dislike of her, it’s OK.  Certainly not a winner.

Oh and how about Eva Longoria Parker’s gay man snap about Tommy steaming his own clothes.  Bazing!

Oh oh, and then!  At the end, I saw the most amazing thing ever: A Catty Bitch named Tim Gunn.  That’s right, Tim Gunn, Mr. I wish he was my grandpa so I could hang out with him and hear wonderful advice and support himself, did not look Johnny in eye while giving him a stiff “Clear out your workspace” while picking meaningfully at his sleeve.  I’ve never heard Tim Gunn talk smack, but the moment Johnny left he cackled, “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, you lying, drug-addled, lazy jerk!  I’m sorry I ever helped you through the first episode.”

Project Runway 605; Tim Gunn gets catty

Obama: Kanye is a Jackass; South Carolina is an idiot

Gay fish.

Have I mentioned lately that I am completely embarrassed to be from South Carolina sometimes.

South Carolina is very special in its politics.  Disregarding my own sentiments, it comes from an incredible religious, right wing background, that focuses on keeping the majority black and poor population from becoming politically powerful.  The state has terrible education, and you’ll probably recall that Mark Sanford, Mr. Appalachian Trail himself, made headlines long before that by refusing to take the stimulus money.

Meanwhile, the Republican party has waffled and wavered on asking him to step down because of the barely contained contempt they seem to have for one Lt. Gov Bauer.  Bauer has been arrested for speeding, calling the cops not to stop him from speeding because he was Lt. Gov, and he crashed a plane.  So, I mean, he’s a really cool guy.  He’s also unmarried and a rumoured homosexual.

The other problem is that one of the most powerful Republicans is third in line and doesn’t want to lose power by becoming Lt. Gov, a pretty meaningless position. It’s as if the Party is having to choose between Sanford limping to the finish, or the real risk of Bauer becoming governor and running with that advantage next election cycle.

Obama: Kanye is a Jackass; South Carolina is an idiot

Story Assistant

Yesterday was a strange up and down day.  My job is in a state of change, and I’m not quite sure what the outcome will be.  It seems likely that I will be promoted to Story Assistant, which would be fantastic.  That’s a sort of cross between editing and writing assistant, which is rather perfect for my interests and strengths.

At least… I think that’s what the job entails.  No one’s actually told me, and it seems like the term “Story Assistant” means whatever each show wants it to mean.  I’ve been told it means I’ll be researching the footage, I’ve been told it means I’ll be cutting story lines, and I’ve been told it’s somehow assisting the writers or the editors.  I guess in reality those lines are blurred.

But I’m excited if this is true.  Hopefully it’ll be more money, which is good because my medical bills are ridiculous, and I think it will at least mean an end to the letters that say “Oh, you’re a logger, gross, please don’t apply for work until you’ve washed the stench of that embarrassing job from your flesh.”

Story Assistant

Up and Down; Script, Web Series, Inktip; Allergies

So the webseries thing keeps ping ponging back and forth between happening and not happening.  If it does happen, I’m probably going to lose my Thanksgiving.  Theoretically also my Christmas, except I’m not willing to give up my Christmas and my Thanksgiving.  So.

There’s another short that I’ve been contacted about.  I just got the script, it’s cute, but quite long for a ‘short’.  I find that to be a common problem.  Short shorts get shown more!

And!  Excitingly!  A producer/director team contacted me to read my script.  This was from an ad on Mandy (see the link on the sidebar) and they contacted me very quickly.  So far Inktip has been a complete disappointment.  The script has come up on maybe 6 people’s searches, and no one’s read the synopsis.  It could be a problem of the logline, but, seeing the company names, it just seems like it’s not being found by people who are interested in comedy.

I took a benadryl and a claritin this morning, meaning I had two antihistamines in my system when I went to get my allergy skin test done. My reaction was so terrible that they called everyone who works there in to see.

Dr: Are you trying to win a prize?
Me: No allergies would be a good one, you got that?
Dr: Oh. Um, well.

And, for people like me who can’t get enough of other people’s medical melodrama, you can click here for the picture.

Up and Down; Script, Web Series, Inktip; Allergies

Always Something

Last night I had a long production meeting about a webseries that I’ve been tapped to be the Post Supervisor/Lead Editor on.  Which is exciting, but we’re not sure when the production is actually going to get produced.  So, right now, there are 3 different web series that I’m theoretically on board for but that aren’t quite getting produced just yet.  I’m still hoping that something comes through in the next couple weeks, but we’ll see.

The production was in the house of someone with cats.  I am very allergic to cats, I don’t understand why people have cats.  It’s like rubbing peanuts all over your house.  Sure, not everyone is allergic, but a lot of people are, and the ones that are have a real bad reaction.

Anyway, I was already woozy and weird and now one of my eyes is swollen shut.  So I called in sick to work, because I didn’t want to drive with one eye only kind of working and then have to sit in front of a computer in an allergic haze.  Yeah.

I’m trying to get in to this medical research thing about allergies.  I’m going to get a skin prick test today.  Seriously, anything for money out here.  I was disappointed when the ad for an adult film editor was taken off craigslist.  Hey, it’s work!

K.  I’m going to crawl back in bed for a while.  I’m hoping my eye returns to a normal size before I’m supposed to go to the doctor.

Always Something

On Editing vs Writing

It’s sort of strange to be out here actively pursuing two different careers — writing and editing.  Writing is in some ways a much more natural outlet of mine, I don’t know that I could stop writing if someone told me I had to.  But, editing is a craft that I’ve been well trained in and is easy to market as a skill.  And I think the two seemingly different focuses are actually very similar.

You write the script, the director paints the film, and then the editor does a final polish.  In the editing room, I’ve created stories whole, rewritten things that didn’t work, and done things as simple as putting the shots in the order they’re supposed to go.  I can see how some people would find editing tedious, but massaging cuts is very rewarding to some OCD part of my brain.  Making comedic timing perfect or letting someone linger just long enough on a difficult moment.  The things you can do to cheat a shot are never ending.  Warp the time to fit words in someone’s mouth, speed things up when a take is too long, splice two shots together.  Cheating is fun.

I’m going to most likely be cutting a reel for an actress in the next couple weeks.  I find this exciting for lots of reasons. I love seeing actors ranges.  I worked as Casting Director for the Thesis Films and held casting in Tallahassee, NY and LA.  I loved seeing actors audition and give different renditions of the same words.  I also got thousands and thousands (not exaggerating) of submissions, many of whom sent in reels.  I watched a couple reels and almost inevitably the reels made me not nearly as enthusiastic as the headshot.  But occasionally, just occasionally, something in a reel really spoke to me.  I’m hoping to have the chance to do that for someone.

Of course, the difference between writing and editing is, when you edit, no matter how much you cheat, you can’t change what’s in the footage.

On Editing vs Writing